i’m seventeen and i’ve never been in love. Not that every seventeen year old has, is, or even should be, but when is it you should be in love, truly? i’m not sure anyone can truly have an answer for that but as for me, i don’t believe in wasting it, love. i solemnly believe that love and “i love you’s” are meant for exactly one person. there is exactly one person destined for you on earth.

i, being a teen, let alone a teen girl, have my emotions strapped to a rollercoaster. I have my days where i “feel” my flaws. i realized i missed the lesson of self love and self confidence. completely. and i want to make sure i love who i am before i could ever possible expect that from someone else. i guess if anything, our first love’s should be from ourselves. fall in love with who we are.

i wish to be completely happy with someone one day. to know that love is mutual between the one i will someday love. i hope they'll be patient. i'll make them wait only because i want to be friends before they could ever stand to be my lover and i hope they always remind me that they love me because some days i’ll need that more than others i hope to be cherished.

i want the right guy. i don't want the "let's just hook up and forget about each other the next minute" kind of thing, because that's bs. i want the type of guy that's not afraid to admit what he's feeling, the type who can make me feel uncontrollably happy even if he's not by my side at the moment. the kind who cares about how i’m feeling, cares about what's going on in my head. the kind where he's comfortable with my friends. the kind i can go home and tell everyone, this is the one. i'll marry him, i'll be the mother to his kids, he'll be by my side and i'll be by his. I want to have the “mom, i've made it, i found the one” moment. i can introduce him to everyone i know as the one who's gonna hold my heart in 86 years from now, the one i'm going home to when i'm done with grocery shopping. the one, that i bring to family parties, family reunion, family everything. he will be the one. the one i can just look at and be grinning from ear to ear.

i pray that one day i’ll find a man who loves me so much. i pray that he accepts every flaw and insecurity i may have and shows the beauty in me. someone who chooses me every day and never thinks twice about it. to be with someone who motivates me to become better and who will show me the potential i don't see in myself. someone who’d willingly would want to have nap dates and bake cookies at two in the morning, someone to hype me up.

in the end, i want to make sure i love him with all my heart, and vice versa, and everyday i feel that way.