Pimples. They exist. We hate them.

cat, funny, and grunge image
me @ acne

Here are my ratings of different pimples, from "ok" to "make me want to rip my face off":

at Number 6: Blackheads
- mildly annoying
- fun to extract though
- feeling generous so final score 6/10

Number 5: Mysterious Textured Bumps
- where did they come from? where do they go?
- make it hard to apply foundation/concealer smoothly
- boring. 5/10

Number 4: Whiteheads
- make ur skin irritated and red
- they bleed so much, omg
- and!! they scar so easily!!!
- just when you think they're finally gone, they fill back up 🤢 GET OUTTT
- the grossest type of pimple
- hate them. 2/10

ok, we're moving along and the ratings are plummeting. next we have
Number 3: Mouth pimples
- technically not a different type of pimple, but they're extra annoying.
- split open every time you open your mouth
- sting when you eat
- would score lower but sometimes they make your lips a lil plumper
- wannabe herpes. 1.5/10

Number 2: Eye Cysts
- make blinking hurt sooo much
- impossible to get rid of
- pop them and you'll get an eye infection
- literally pointless
- no. 0/10

and coming in at Number One, we have:
Cystic Subterranean Monsters
- oh, you have an event coming up in 3 days? Don't worry, these nasties will only be here for 3 WEEKS (if you're lucky)
- can and will swell up to the size of quarter
- did i mention how inflamed and painful they are
- there's nothing you can do about them :)
- feels like an alien parasite is about to hatch out of your face (-5000000000)/10

Hmm, would you rate these types of pimples differently? (Personally, I think I went too easy on blackheads.) If you also hate cystic acne with the fiery passion of a thousands burning suns, feel free to give this article a heart.

- @peach_light