Pop Psychology nicely packages breakup into denial, anger, bargaining, de****n, and acceptance, or you know any other stages of post-breakup grief... but what comes with a breakup is much more than that...
So what are we left with after a breakup?
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Yes, it is another article about heartbreak among many that I already have on my blog, and trust me when I say it I have A LOT.
What can I say your gal has had her fair share of broken hearts, and you might think "well at this point she must have learned how to deal with it and not have to write yet another article about it", but there is something very important that I realized this time around, and I want to share it with you.
So whether you are reading this with a painful sting in your heart, a glass of rose at your side, sitting by a bonfire made out of pictures of your ex, or a candle with sacrifice you've made to love gods to bring him back to you, I invite you to come on this journey with me to accept what we are actually left with after a breakup.
Angel In Purgatory
Angel In Purgatory
@Angelinpurgatory  
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Will You accept my invitation?
A) Yes, let's go.
B) Sure why not.
C) idk why I'm here, no thanks.
If you choose A or B, hi, I feel your pain.
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a guy that I dated for almost a year and was completely in love with broke up with me a week ago. I don't really know if you guys care for the story therefore I'll keep it brief. We broke up, as an idiot I cried and tried to convince him to give me a chance, saying I can fix everything, at that moment it felt like my life depended on that relationship, that if he walked out that door the world would come crumbling down.
"We can make it work," he said.
"So will you stay with me?" I asked holding onto every bit of hope left in my body.
"No, we're breaking up because even if we can make it work I'm not willing to try anymore"
After that, it was all a blur.

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And don't get me wrong I hold no anger for him, he had his reasons, I am not spiteful in any way. On the contrary, I wish him all the best. As soon as he walked out my body collapsed to the floor screaming (talk about being a drama queen), a couple of sleeping pills later I was sound asleep in my bed. I couldn't get out for 3 days all I wanted was to sleep and forget what my reality was.
Once I finally came out of my three-day haze (thanks to my friend and always my maybe (but that's a story for a different time)), things started to take on a different perspective.
When we are in relationships the other person tends to become our priority, we switch around our schedule in order to make as much room for them as possible, consider them with every decision that we make, and each day waiting for their text to pop up on our screens. and sometimes without noticing it we take on the same life ideology as theirs.
Angel In Purgatory
Angel In Purgatory
@Angelinpurgatory  
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Once my friend left and I woke up to the reality that for the first time in my life I was completely alone, no guys, no crushes, no boyfriend, and the fact that he was never coming back into my life. Before that, I didn't really believe that we were over for good, but after a week of no contact that followed him telling me three times that we are definitely not getting back together and that he doesn't regret his decision, it finally registered in my head.
Sitting on my bed completely alone both physically and metaphorically I wondered, what was I going to do now? because all my future plans were built around him. I planned on taking an online semester just so I could stay with him till he graduates and then doing an exchange year to the same university or same state he goes to and then transferring there. But now what was I going to do?
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and don't worry I was not completely that girl who falls in love and throws her life away, I still kept working on writing and publishing my book as well as my plans for my youtube channel.
but whether you are the most career-driven person, a deeply independent and self-aware one, or just a normal girl in love with love, we all find ourselves building our futures around our partners yellow brick road.
So what happens once its gone?
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at first, the decision came out of a place called "I want to be as far away from him as possible" but then it turned into "because I actually want to" I decided to apply to start the semester on campus. Next came the decision of actually posting that youtube video, afterward I went to see my friend for a little photoshoot, and in the morning sat down to watch some videos about the Law of Attraction.
Once the breakup happened, and all the broken pieces and shatters from the battlefield were cleared away, once the roads I had attached to his in a desperate attempt to follow him on his life path instead of taking mine, fell off, all I was left with was Me.
So what does a breakup actually leave us with?
The answer is Ourselves.
Yes right after there are tears, and broken nights, rebounds, shopping sprees, and a lot of pain. But we all have to work that away in order to get to the true blessing of a breakup which is finding ourselves again.
Angel In Purgatory
Angel In Purgatory
@Angelinpurgatory  
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Because of my boyfriend, I had gotten really bad, stopped believing in the Law of Attraction because he said it was bullsh*t, started having insecurities because he'd make fun of the parts of me I was most insecure about...
if I had kept going altering my life to try to follow his I would stay miserable. Now I am finally following my own path.
When all the boys fall away when all the reasons we're doing things and altering our paths for are gone when the lanterns that lit the direction signs are turned off all we are left with is us and what we want.
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follow your path and the love that you are actually meant to be with will be on it, not a great detour that leads you to sacrifice yours.
So get out of bed once the grief is over and look around you're now in a world full of possibilities with no guidelines on where to go, what do you want? it's all about you now!
And I have found my freedom in that.

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Angel In Purgatory
Angel In Purgatory
@Angelinpurgatory