Temporarily removed
Losing someone close to you is always heartbreaking. It's as if a part of you left with them; apart of you that you can't get back. This article is about grief, handling it, and so on. After loosing my best friend in an accident, I've learned many new things when it comes to grief,that helped me get back on my feet after completely disconnecting myself from everyone and thing.

1. It's okay not to force yourself to be "okay", or force yourself to be who you were before the loss.
- When my loss happened,I believed that everyone around me just wanted me to be okay right away and "act normal". With that mindset, it only caused repressed my feelings and emotions, it became so much more difficult than it needed to be.

Image removed

2. When all you can do is blame yourself.
-This is a mixture of the 'denial' stage of grief I've come to notice. I begun to irrationally blaming myself for what happened, even when it was far from my fault. It was a way of kind of giving myself an answer to my "why", since she wasn't there to answer..

beautiful, black, and cloudy image

3. Learning to live with what happened.
- I often go by the saying, "I won't ever move on, but I will learn to live with it." or even, "It doesn't get easier,but it gets easier to live with." This point also kinda reflects off of the first point, you can't expect yourself to completely forget who you lost. Even if it seems impossible, it will be easier to live with eventually. You can't really rush a process like grief. And that's okay! Acceptance is perhaps the hardest stage to get to.

b&w, beautiful, and beauty image

4. It's okay to have moments and miss them. Even after you reach "acceptance".
- There is good and bad days, but after you get to "acceptance", bad days always seems so much more heavy. Being stuck in that mindset of "Well, x has been gone for y amount of time, I should be over it, it shouldn't bother me anymore." They say grief comes in waves, which is very true. Some more powerful than others, you can't exactly predict it. Although, gradually of course, you can learn how to cope when these waves come crashing onto you.

Mature image

5. Support and comfort.
- Try to surround yourself with people that make you feel comfortable and secure. Although, having time with yourself is good for coming to terms with everything. Especially people who prefer to be alone most of the time (myself). It's a bit conflicting when you are a solitary person and knowing that you need company. It may cause you to feel extremely vulnerable; to rely on someone for comfort in that aspect. Most times when (if) you open yourself to someone about the loss, after keeping it in for while it can be comforting. Although it can be draining and to be out of your comfort (ironic right?) zone midst all of this.

Temporarily removed

6. Understanding everyone's loss is different.
- When you're going through a loss and you look at someone else who seemed to moved on after a certain amount of time. You begin to think, "man, it's been 6 years why am I not over it?" I find this extremely frustrating since I often struggle with this. When I feel grief affecting months, or even years after a death, I feel as if it's not valid. Since it happened and nothing can be done. In the end, a loss is a loss. It's rough,but it does get easier to live with. And it's okay if it still effects you years down the line. It's not invalid in anyway shape or form.

rain, grunge, and clouds image

When you get hurt, over time you will heal.. but there will always be a scar to remind you of how strong you have been and will continue to be.
---------
These are connections that i made while working through my loss. They help when I begin to doubt myself when it comes to either being impatient, frustrated, or angry as to why I still cry over this loss. It just as well gives a good reminder/reassurance that it was out of my power.
---------
Thank you for reading. <3