Hello beautiful, strong, smart, lovely people, welcome to my first article in my new series, FOR A WEEK.
I've noticed that trying to do all my goals all at once usually ends up in nothing being done at all. So I figured that each week, I'll focus on one goal and move on to the next one the next week. This week was for waking up at 5 AM...here's what happened.


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So Monday ended up being really good, in terms of getting up on time. I woke up at 5:02, washed my face, stretched for 30 minutes and read devotions and my Bible for the other 30 minutes. I felt more awake and alert. That day was also incredibly long, because I started my med class, so I was gone from the house from 7:20 to 5:30, and I rode the bus for like an hour and a half, so I was exhausted. I was sticky and hot and just tired and starving because I had forgotten my lunch at home and didn't have money with me.


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Tuesday I woke up 4:55 because my cat was beginning a little hecker and making noise. It was easier to get up that morning because I had woken up five minutes earlier, so I laid in my bed, making sure to keep my eyes open so I didn't fall asleep again. I mainly stretched and danced and worked out the whole time, with a quick ten minute devotional time at the end. Tuesday was not as exhausting as the day before because I was knew what to expect with my new class and actually had food with me that day. That morning, I asked my friend what time her cheer practice ended, and she said five, which is when the bus takes me from the college back to the high school. She's my neighbor, so she was able to take me home. This made me feel better because I felt bad for having to have my parents come all the way into town to get me. We even went to Dutch Bros after and got drinks and I felt refreshed. This is the ex best friend I'd mentioned in my other articles. We talked a little, and apologized and everything seemed okay. That was a really, really, really good day for me.


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The next day, I got up once again at 5:00 and feeling awesome. It was getting easier and easier. That day, my friend Kasey offered to take me from the school to the college in her truck, so I didn't have to ride the sticky bus. Shelby didn't have cheer practice that day, so Kasey brought me home. My parents met her and her friend Abby (who was riding with us) and I felt happy because...I felt like I had friends who I got to hang out with outside of the school walls.


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Thursday was harder. I woke up, washed my face, but then fell back into bed with the lamp on until six o clock. I had to go to the dentist that day, so I had more time to get ready. At the dentist, I found out that the sore in my mouth is not actually just a sore from me biting my lip, but actually (this might be gross for some of you) was a clogged salivary gland. I bite my lip a lot, and never really realized how big it was until that day when I actually intentionally looked. I felt it, but always just thought it was just a sore from biting my lip...but now I have to wait. If it doesn't go away or if it starts hurting, we'll have to get it removed surgically. Yay...
With that happy news, I went to school. When mom dropped me off, she was like "Communicate with me and tell me if Shelby can take you home or not" and I kind of just nodded and said I would...but I forgot. I remembered like twice throughout the day, but something came up each time and I forgot to call my mom. We also got home late, and I didn't think to call her. I got in kind of big trouble because she was anxious and waiting for me to call and really worried and I didn't help the situation with how I didn't take responsibility right away.


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Friday was awful. Mostly for personal issues. Thursday night, I got only a few hours of sleep because my brain wouldn't stop worrying and thinking. When my alarm went off that morning, I shut it off right away. I felt really depressed and lonely, and went through the day feeling sluggish and not awake. I didn't really speak at all, and pushed away the people who tried talking to me. I even told Shelby we couldn't hang out on Saturday (I mean we probably couldn't anyway because I was in trouble) even though I didn't ask. Shelby and I haven't hung out in months besides her taking me home...she was going to go to Zumba with us that morning and work out with me at the Y. But that day I was scared that we'd make the same mistakes we made before and so I felt stupid for letting myself think we could be close again.
I also made it worse by not reaching out for help and hiding how much I was hurting, so I felt so far away from everyone. I just wanted to scream, "I"M RIGHT HERE. SOMEONE PLEASE NOTICE..."

Anyway, sorry for the rant. The first half of the week was amazing, filled with hope and happiness, and then it felt as if my luck ran out as the week wore one.

The overall thing I took away from this week is that I can reach my goals if I push myself. When things got hard, I used that as an excuse to get out of getting up early. But what I have to realize is that I'm going to have bad days, and I have to learn how to seperate that from my habits so that it won't hinder my ability to function.
My next article in this series is going to be about going a week eating right. I have different goals in this particular area, so I'll get into that later. I will also continue to try to get up at 5, but my main focus will be on eating. Wish me luck xx