So much hurt,
I've become so disconcert.
I don't know how to act,
I'm not sure when my life got so off track.

Maybe it was the sexual abuse.
Maybe it was Dad's booze.
Maybe it was the nights listening to my mom's screams and cries.
Maybe it was the nights I listened to the sound of dishes fly.
Maybe it was the night I helplessly watched you smack my brother.
Maybe it was the night you pinned my mother.
Maybe it was the night you said "Go ahead" and handed me a knife.
Maybe it was you cheating on your wife.
Maybe it was the night he choked me out.
Or the night he brought a dislocated shoulder about.

I'm so broken.
It's hard to let my past be spoken.
Worried what others think.
Life passes by in a blink.
If I really want to be free,
I must focus on me.