Hey everyone, welcome to a brand new series. In this series, I am going to focus all about self-care and self-love. once we learn how to care and love ourselves all areas of our lives change for the better. Taking care of yourself is the first building block to achieving anything you want in life. So let us get started with the 5 things you must let go of in order to launch your self-love journey.

No 1: Comparison

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No two journeys are the same. You need to have faith in the timing of your own life and do what feels best for you. What works for one person might not work for another. Comparing other's achievements with yours is a sure way to lower your self-esteem, as we tend to overestimate others and underrate ourselves. Moreover what one sees on social media is another person's highlights, don't forget that everyone has hardships and not only you. You may feel behind in life when you compare your life to that of others, but let me tell you, there is no timeline, it is just something our ego holds on to. But in reality, there are no specific times for you to reach your milestones. Remember this especially when it comes to your self-growth journey.

2. Victim mentality

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How many times do we sit there and waste our time at our own pity parties? I sure am guilty of this. But let me tell you something, once you paint yourself as the victim you are giving your power away. Take radical responsibility for each and every action you take. This might seem too much on your shoulders but this will give you the freedom you never experienced before. You might want to blame your parents for the way you act in an intimate relationship. Well, this will take away your power to change things, it is only when you realise that it is you and only you that decides what you want to believe and what you want to do. So go ahead, shut down that pity party, burst all of the balloons and start building your life from an empowered position, and start seeing your life change in front of your own eyes.

3.People pleasing

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How many of you agree with what your friends are saying despite you knowing deep at your core that you don't. How many times did you say yes when all you wanted was to say no. Well, it is time to honour yourself by being authentic and speaking your truth. I recently heard a podcast on how not to be nice. Well, it was all about stopping people-pleasing. A very important point made was that the opposite of nice is not being an asshole but actually being authentic. It also discussed the fact that most nice people hold onto them unexpressed emotions and opinions which build up as anger and then they end up unleashing them on their loved ones. So give yourself permission not to be nice and be authentic instead.

4. Waiting for your night in shining armour

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I was guilty of this myself. Since we are little we are fed the notion that we need our prince in order to be whole, in order to start living our best life but this furthest from the truth. Your best life is right here and right now. If you have no one in this world but yourself, you are still enough and you already have all it takes to build the life you want. There is nothing wrong with having connections with others and sometimes even depending on others for support but you must first find strength in being on your own. Being single for a long while has helped me connect with my true self and it helped me know how to have my own back. Sometimes it is tough, and sometimes you feel alone but it is through those times you find yourself, create your own escape plan and save yourself from the dragon.

5. Sugarcoating it

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Well, this self-care/ love journey is going to be a challenge. Social media tends to paint self-care as manicures, long baths and massages. Well, there is nothing wrong with indulging in such activities, I do so myself. But this journey can get messy, there will be times when you feel it is taking you nowhere there will be times you fall back into your old patterns and feel like giving up and that is ok. So I want you to know this beforehand so that when it does get though, you are not taken by surprise but instead you face the challenges that arise head-on. For instance, when you will quiet your mind and get deep, you might find things you have been burying deep down for so long. This might bring unwanted emotions but it is only through feeling these that you may heal.

So that's all for article number 1. If you enjoyed this article and would love me to lead you through this self-love journey don't forget to follow me and my self-love series. I also have a summer health series and other articles in my blog all about self-improvement and growth. Wish you all a good luck and talk to you all next Tuesday where we will be discussing the stumbling blocks that are stopping you from loving yourself and how to move beyond them into radical self-love.

Love you loads
xxx