"i don't know what to say", he said.
"it's okay", she replied. "i know what we are - and i know what we are not."

hello guys!

this is my second article now, and i thought very long about a topic i could write about.

sadly, i am a bit heartbroken lately and i fell in the whole i couldn't get out easily.
to avoid this again, i chose to write an article about what you should do after a heartbreak and what you should not do. but at first, i thought i could tell you guys what happened to me.

my first real love story

31 october 2018
we all know what kind of day is on this day, it's halloween! in germany halloween isn't that popular, we have carnival here. but my best friend decided to do a halloween party. i was very impressed by this idea, because i love halloween more than carnival.

autumn, fall, and candle image

since my best friend is going to a technical college and i'm not, we both went our own separate ways. she met new friends, i met new friends.
like, a week before the party was she asked me "hey there is this guy, a good friend of mine now, in my class he is so funny i'm thinking of inviting him to the party" and i was like "yeah sure invite him so i can check if he is a good friend".

so she invited him. and we met at the halloween party. well, i would say that me and him had this mysterious connection from the beginning on. we became very good friends in a very short time, he knew so much about me. but we both knew that it's more than a friendship. we called very long til 5 am in the morning for example even though we both had work and had to stand up early in the morning.

i don't know how it became like that, but we both came to the point where we wanted to date each other so badly. but i couldn't date him. i was 16 years old in that moment and since my parents are religious, they would've never allowed it. he wanted me to tell it to my parents but i couldn't. i didn't want to break them. that was the reason why we stopped talking.

we always found to each other again, we started texting again, calling again. we couldn't do it with and without each other.
he fucked up so bad with me once, he indirectly told me that he can't see a future with me. this was the most horrible thing he said to me.
he broke my heart so often but i always loved him. he said so many rude things but i didn't stop loving him.

but i chose that it's better if we don't have contact, that's why i blocked him everywhere on social media.

26 july 2019
on this day i was in the city with friends of mine, we went to mc donalds before we went home and i saw him, walking inside. it broke my heart so much, we ignored each other i even cried in the bathroom, i cried myself into sleep that night.

the day after i decided to text him again, well long story short: we called again very long and after a few days i talked to him about us. he still had feelings for me, i still had feelings for him. but if we think logical, we weren't meant for each other. we tried it like 5 times and it didn't work. i cried so hard as i told him that and he agreed, he said it wouldn't work.
the next morning i got a text from him he wrote at 3 am to me. it was basically a text about our love story. he said that i'm a wonderful person and that i should wait for the right guy because he knows there is someone outside who will give me the love i want and need. he wrote so much more and this was our goodbye. he wanted me to delete his number, and i did that yesterday. maybe it'll help me to forget him.

maybe this story doesn't sound heartbreaking to you, but this is literally the short version of it. it happened many more things i can't tell you, but it hurt.

what you should (not) do after a heartbeak

Temporarily removed

now we are at the most interesting part of the article, what you should (not) do after a heartbreak.


  • cry your feelings and emotions out

the first thing you should do after a heartbreak is really to cry yourself out. show your emotions, show how you feel and let it all out. maybe call your best friend and talk to her, best friends usually know what's the best for one.

  • distract yourself

try to distract yourself. don't think too much about the person, it'll make it worse. go outside for a walk, eat ice cream, party, anything. try out new things, hang out with friends or meet new people. that'll help a lot, believe me.

  • delete pictures with him/her or chats or BETTER: his/her number

i know this is very hard, but delete pictures, chats and his/her number. that's the only way you can forget him/her. i did it and i feel a bit better now even though it was a very hard decision.

anime image


  • don't watch love movies and cry telling yourself that you are single like a pringle

i know what i'm talking about, i did it too. just don't do it, please.

  • don't look at old photos and read chats

it'll just make you remember the good days you two had, but remember the reason why you both ended it. remember why you are heartbroken.

  • don't drink alcohol and make out with other guys or girls

i know, i said distraction helps, but not this kind of distraction. i just wouldn't do it, except you are a person who thinks that helps. i just don't think that's a good idea because in my opinion it'll make everything worse.

anime, sushi, and 90s image

last but not least, 10 songs you can listen to when you are heartbroken:

1) someone you loved - lewis capaldi

2) fallin' all in you - shawn mendes

3) let me down slowly - alec benjamin

4) when the party's over - billie eilish

5) perfect - ed sheeran

6) shallow - lady gaga & bradley cooper

7) i love you - billie eilish

8) when i was your man - bruno mars

9) memories - shawn mendes

10) lovely - billie eilish & khalid

aesthetic, anime, and 90s anime image

if anybody of you needs someone to talk, i'm here for everyone of you!
xoxo sel