I'd appreciate it greatly if you'd take a couple of minutes to read what I have to say, because, trust me on this one, you may need to hear this more than you think.

Why do people say mind over matter?

I like to think it stands for 'reason before everything else', because that's where your power truly lies.
As someone who used to guide herself through life based solely on what my heart told me, I can't say it was wrong, just that at times it was overwhelming and beyond difficult to cope with. Now, I'm not saying listening to your heart is wrong, but being a person (that I totally was) who's open to anything and everything around her, people's sneaky comments, unfortunate circumstances, little life tragedies, I ended up being vulnerable at all times, scarred and torn by things I absolutely could've dodged. But, no. I stood there, arms spread widely, thinking if I go through as much pain as I could, it'll eventually dry out and I won't be able to hurt as much, ever again. I've learned the tougher way that's not how hurt works. It's a bottomless pit, you end up digging out for yourself if you choose to leap inside. Finding a latter long enough to pull yourself out is excruciatingly hard. But if you're the type who likes to torture themselves for some reason, sure, go on, dive right in.

As I tended to feel as much as I could, I found myself wallowing in everything no one wants to stick around for too long - sadness, sorrow, pity, self-doubt, discontent, everything losing meaning under the strength of my emotions. It's just that when you give too much, there's a 99% chance you won't receive nearly the same amount back. You're not supposed to be halfhearted or half-assed, but it does hurt always being on the other end - the one who gave too much. You should be clever enough to evaluate people and situations first, in order to protect yourself. For one thing I know, it's anything but easy, and for me it was a thing I had to and still have to learn from a scratch, as something I've simply never done. I put myself out there always ending up as the one who got hurt. Well, let me tell you, even the softest of hearts get tired of that.

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My sincere advice here is to simply turn on your brain. Seriously, flip that switch on. I don't think we consider enough or at all what our brain is screaming in those moments we impulsively jump to act upon the tiniest whisper of our heart. That way we only put down what we are, how clever we can be and shrink ourselves down to a need, an impulse. Because when you turn to your mind, you discover parts of yourself you've never even imagined, things you thought you never could be, because there's that annoying little voice you blindly trust that says 'naah, no way I can, no way I'm good enough'. Where's the reason in that? Why can't you be? Because the 'little voice' told you so? What a sad way to dump all your potential.

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DO NOT label yourself as your emotions. You're not sad. You feel sad. You're not angry. You feel angry. It's a thing, a sensation that comes and goes as any other. Every single person out there feels, but did they all quit their job or left their loved ones because of couple of bad days, weeks or what ever time it took? A friendly advice here, don't always trust an aching heart, it can be a gloomy little trickster.
Look into your mind instead, look at what can you do, what can't you but you've always wanted to and make it clear what you definitely want your life to circle around. Make it crystal, for once, for yourself. You're tired of drowning in quicksand of maybes, coulds and what ifs, of doubting and then rising and then falling again and thinking you're just not strong enough. When it comes to you, you have to be impeccably stubborn, restlessly boring, pester yourself with always pushing up. No matter what you feel, grab it and toss it in a trash bin and wonder who are you outside of your feels. If there wasn't for your heart that gets obnoxiously heavy sometimes, what else is left? Think of it as a 50/50 ratio. Both your mind and your heart have their bad times, but that's not your whole. There's always the other side to keep you floating.

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Don't estimate all you are based on how you feel the way I did, don't do that to yourself. Don't shut off your very capable imaginative side because something temporary is bothering you. Don't put your worth down and stop yourself from discovering all that you can be because you 'feel too much' and that's it. The definition of you. What about the rest of me?, you should wonder. Being able to feel a lot is beautiful, but oh, it's a burden.

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Just think of yourself twice as tough, twice as strong for being able to deal with emotions of a depth of the entire ocean AND go out there and accomplish shit and be awesome along the way. You've got a secret superpower deep within you, but you walk around with a steady face and calm attitude and no one can possibly see through it when they look at you. Remember that they don't know and they don't need to know, if that's how you wish it to be.
Don't break down over everything and anyone. Guard your gift fiercely for the special ones. And when you chose to show them that side, trust me, they'll be taken aback with depths of the most beautiful sparkling blue ocean they've ever seen.

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Hope I was able to help, at least a little bit. Stay gorgeous, loves!
~ Love, Angie♡