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I was eighteen when I first left my home to start a new life in Bali, and I was the first in my big family who was daring enough to go to a place far away and usually Javanese girls around my age are not allowed to live on their own until theyโ€™re married but I am so thankful that my parents are open-minded people unlike Javanese parents in general (even though they called me crazy but itโ€™s okay, I know I am). I still remember the thrill of it all, the adrenaline that I got when I thought about living in a place that I know nothing about. I was super excited and super scared at the same time. That would be my very first time to live alone in a place where I know literally no one. I know some people felt that too when they first take that big leap in their life, and I think Iโ€™d like to share some tips that Iโ€™ve learned personally to help you overcome your worries of the new life youโ€™re about to begin.

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*These are best applied for those whoโ€™ll live on their own.

// ๐‘ฉ๐’†๐’‡๐’๐’“๐’† ๐’€๐’๐’– ๐‘ด๐’๐’—๐’†

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โ€ข ๐—ฃ๐—ผ๐˜€๐—ถ๐˜๐—ถ๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ ๐— ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฑ๐˜€๐—ฒ๐˜ โ€“ The first and the most important thing is, you will want to set positive thoughts during this crucial time of your life. Moving out can be scary and exhausting, but think about why you're doing this in the first place and all the good things that it will bring you to. For me, moving out of my parents' house means I'll learn to live more independently and be responsible, adulting stuff. I kept telling myself that this moment will bring me closer to the life I'm trying to create; find your own motivation! It'll be a hard thing to do when you're doing it with a heavy heart.

โ€ข ๐—Ÿ๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜ ๐—ถ๐˜ ๐˜‚๐—ฝ โ€“ Before youโ€™re ready to move, make a list of all the things that you will need to accomplish including the things that need to be packed, people that need to be contacted, etc. You may not like to make a list, but organizing it will make it much easier.
โ€ข ๐—š๐—ฒ๐˜ ๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—น๐—ฝ โ€“ After youโ€™ve made your list, youโ€™ll be able to predict how much time you will need to pack, and usually packing is always time-consuming. Ask your parents or siblings or even invite your friends to help you with packing your things and make sure you wonโ€™t miss a thing.
โ€ข ๐—–๐—ผ๐—ป๐˜๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐˜ ๐—ฐ๐—ผ๐—บ๐—ฝ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ถ๐—ฒ๐˜€ โ€“ If youโ€™re subscribing to a company, youโ€™ll need to contact them to update about it. If you wonโ€™t need their services any longer, tell them when to end it but if youโ€™re still going to continue using that company, youโ€™ll need to update them about your new address. Some examples of the companies youโ€™ll need to update:

  • Your doctorโ€™s office
  • Your bank
  • Your credit/debit card company
  • Your health insurance company.
  • Your auto insurance company
  • Your language courses
  • Any government programs youโ€™re a part of, etc.

// ๐‘ซ๐’–๐’“๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ ๐‘ด๐’๐’—๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ

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โ€ข ๐—ง๐—ฎ๐—ธ๐—ฒ ๐—ฌ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ง๐—ถ๐—บ๐—ฒ โ€“ Donโ€™t try to unpack everything in one day! You will want to take your time to explore your new space so you can decide where to put everything in a leisurely way. Besides, youโ€™ll get extremely overwhelmed and ended up having a bad vibe about moving out.
โ€ข ๐—”๐˜€๐˜€๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ฐ๐—ฒ โ€“ If you have family/friend to help you move, assign them with specific tasks so theyโ€™ll know exactly what to do. You can ask your mom to help set your bedroom or your brother to bring those heavy boxes to your room on the third floor.
โ€ข ๐—•๐—ฒ ๐—” ๐—š๐—ผ๐—ผ๐—ฑ ๐—ก๐—ฒ๐—ถ๐—ด๐—ต๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐—ฟ โ€“ Seriously, first impressions do matter whether you like it or not. I am a shy creature and making contact with a stranger is very horrifying at some particular moments, especially this kind of moments. But spending a minute to greet someone at your apartmentโ€™s parking lot may save you a lot of hardship in the long run. Ask your neighbors to recommend a local attraction, places to eat, laundromats, etc. Who knows youโ€™ll end up being best friend with them?
โ€ข ๐—–๐—ต๐—ฒ๐—ฐ๐—ธ ๐—˜๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐—ฟ๐˜†๐˜๐—ต๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด โ€“ Inspect your new home closely and make sure that everything is as it should be. Make sure all the door locks work, the water taps flow, the light switches work, etc. Immediately address anything that is not right to your new landlord, youโ€™re going to spend a fair amount of your life there so make sure youโ€™ll be comfortable in your new home.
After Youโ€™re Settled
โ€ข ๐—ฃ๐—ž๐—ช โ€“ Phone, keys, wallet. Check twice before you go anywhere, especially when you live on your own, youโ€™ll have to rely on yourself so you wonโ€™t lock yourself out or leave your wallet at a sushi bar in a mall. Make duplicates of your keys and give one to a friend who lives nearby who you can count on. Your landlord can let you in during office hours, but your trustworthy friend can help you 24/7. I also keep duplicates of my motorbike's key, but I keep it to myself.
โ€ข ๐—–๐—น๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—ป๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—ฅ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐˜๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ฒ โ€“ Spend half an hour to make a schedule of basic cleaning routine that youโ€™ll need and make it as a habit. I used to often leave my space like a shipwreck and honestly, it stressed me out when I came back from work looking at the mess that is my own place. Spend at least an hour every day to clean up your apartment, preferably in the morning before you leave since youโ€™ll get tired once you go home in the afternoon.
โ€ข ๐— ๐—ฎ๐—ธ๐—ฒ ๐—” โ€˜๐— ๐—ผ๐˜ƒ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ดโ€™ ๐—ฆ๐—ต๐—ผ๐—ฝ๐—ฝ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด ๐—Ÿ๐—ถ๐˜€๐˜ โ€“ Especially when youโ€™re moving from across the state (or to a neighbor island, in my case) where transportation wonโ€™t cut it and plane rides are not cheap, youโ€™ll want to do a big shopping of all the basic essentials (minus foods) that will help you to get through your first week. Sometimes itโ€™ll costs you less to just shop at your new place rather than sending your stuff from back home. Get a first aid kit, cleaning supplies, cutleries, etc.
โ€ข ๐— ๐—ฒ๐—ฎ๐—น ๐—ฃ๐—ฟ๐—ฒ๐—ฝ โ€“ The struggle to prepare your meals when you live on your own is real. Before you go shopping, make sure to plan your meals for the week and make a list of the ingredients that youโ€™ll need. Get yourself enough food to make a variety of meals that will only take fifteen minutes of your time, because you donโ€™t want to eat a halfway-cooked fancy rice bowl in the morning since you wonโ€™t have enough time to cook when your class starts at 8. Also, if you donโ€™t have a refrigerator, donโ€™t force yourself to consume Chinese takeaway every day just because itโ€™s pretty cheap and quite fulfilling. Take care of your health! Make sure you eat enough fruits and vegetables to maintain your health.
โ€ข ๐—˜๐—ป๐—ท๐—ผ๐˜†! โ€“ The best thing that comes up with living on your own is freedom. Moving out is exhausting, but youโ€™ll get to decorate the whole place however you want, to forget to make your bed in the morning, or even to have ice cream for dinner! Make sure you enjoy the new life youโ€™ve started, but please do not ever forget to eat three times a day and check up your health at least once a year!
โ€ข ๐—š๐˜‚๐—ฒ๐˜€๐˜๐˜€ ๐—ฆ๐—ฝ๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ฒ โ€“ You may not receive a lot of guests, but who knows when your friend accidentally planning a trip to Bali and needed a free accommodation because they just lost their wallet after a wild beach party in Canggu? I personally donโ€™t have the rooms for guests, but I am not comfortable with sharing my bed so I keep an extra foldable bed and an extra pillow just in case.

// ๐‘ด๐’‚๐’Œ๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ ๐‘ญ๐’“๐’Š๐’†๐’๐’…๐’” ๐’‚๐’๐’… ๐‘บ๐’•๐’‚๐’š๐’Š๐’๐’ˆ ๐‘บ๐’๐’„๐’Š๐’‚๐’

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First thing first, humans are social creatures, even the most introvert person can sometimes get lonely and needs some occasional contact with another human being instead of talking to their pet fish. Donโ€™t really stress about it too much, itโ€™ll happen one way or another. Besides, you wonโ€™t believe all the benefit youโ€™ll get from being social.

โ€ข ๐—•๐—ฒ ๐—ก๐—ถ๐—ฐ๐—ฒ ๐˜๐—ผ ๐—ฌ๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฟ ๐—ก๐—ฒ๐—ถ๐—ด๐—ต๐—ฏ๐—ผ๐—ฟ๐˜€ โ€“ Even if you donโ€™t have a fun or cool neighbor, just keep in mind to be nice at all times. You wonโ€™t know when youโ€™ll need help, or youโ€™ll never know that your grumpy-looking neighbor might be the coolest person in the area and clicked something with you.
โ€ข ๐—™๐—ฟ๐—ถ๐—ฒ๐—ป๐—ฑ๐˜€ ๐—ฏ๐˜† ๐—ฃ๐—ฟ๐—ผ๐˜…๐—ถ๐—บ๐—ถ๐˜๐˜† โ€“ Be it your classmates or co-workers, be social and put down your introvert guards for a brief moment of human interaction. Thereโ€™s a big chance youโ€™ll get to see these people the most so it shouldnโ€™t be difficult to build a friendship. Ask them a lot of questions just like we used to do in elementary school. You got this!
โ€ข ๐—ฃ๐—น๐—ฎ๐—ฐ๐—ฒ๐˜€ โ€“ Find a comfortable place for you and your friends to hang out. Coffee shops, library, parks, pubs, McDonald's; wherever you and your gang find it the most comfortable to spend an hour or two to get to know each other better. Or you can try to come up spontaneously to that other regular customer who sits alone at your favorite coffee shop and ask about the book theyโ€™re reading.
โ€ข ๐—˜๐˜ƒ๐—ฒ๐—ป๐˜๐˜€ โ€“ Events may have the best perks of all. You might find a friend from that other volunteer at the weekly beach cleanup event because both of you have the same interest in the environment. It's easier to befriend with people who have the same niches as you, and you can even grow your connection with a lot of people from different backgrounds! I was volunteering at Green School Bali when I first realize that now I have friends that can get me access to the schoolโ€™s annual sustainability festival.
โ€ข ๐—–๐—ผ๐˜‚๐—ฐ๐—ต๐˜€๐˜‚๐—ฟ๐—ณ๐—ถ๐—ป๐—ด โ€“ *disclaimer: not an ad* Sometimes you can get bored with the people around your area, and if youโ€™re up to meet some new people whether theyโ€™re just coming from another city or theyโ€™re happened to be a tourist from another country, this might be an interesting way to make some friends. I used to hang out with a lot of tourists that came from another part of the world, and we got to travel the island together and it was such an unforgettable memory!

that is all for today! I hope these tips will come in handy for you as much as it did for me. I know moving out is exciting and stressful at the same time, so work with what's best for you to keep yourself from being overwhelmed.

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๐—ง๐—›๐—”๐—ก๐—ž ๐—ฌ๐—ข๐—จ for taking the time to read this article! I'll see you in the next ones!

๐’ˆ๐’ ๐’„๐’‰๐’†๐’„๐’Œ ๐’๐’–๐’• ๐’Ž๐’š ๐’‘๐’“๐’๐’‡๐’Š๐’๐’†!
๐’Ž๐’š ๐’‘๐’“๐’†๐’—๐’Š๐’๐’–๐’” ๐’‚๐’“๐’•๐’Š๐’„๐’๐’†๐’”