Really often we rely on other people to validate our emotions. As if someone agreeing over what we feel will, in some way, make it more real, more valid, more acceptable to feel.

But here is a thing: we are the only one feeling what we feel. Sadness, happiness, frustration, anxiety, translate itself in different ways for everyone. So why waiting for others to validate what we feel?

Maybe to feel less guilty. If you feel stressed or unhappy when everything feels like a dream from the outside as you have a job, a home, a loving family… those feelings will come with guilt. You don’t feel like you have the “right” of feeling unhappy. When you have.

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I am going to speak from personal experience. Recently I found what seemed like the perfect summer job. I’ve done it for almost a month now, but I constantly feel exhausted and I’m not doing anything but working and sleeping. Which is sad for summer holidays right? So, I want to quit it for having at least one month of rest before college start again. I asked so many people their opinions on it, feeling guilty for feeling tired after only one month. But I was not only feeling tired, I was feeling stressed and depressed. My anxiety attacks became more frequent. When I had around one a month (which is still scary), I have now two per week and there are more and more violent.

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I don’t need people to validate what I feel. I do not need people to tell me what to do with my life. I need to listen to my body, to my mind and what there are currently saying is stop. This job, as amazing as it sounded on paper, is more harmful to me than any money could ever cure. I do not want to destroy my health and my summer for money. Never.

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So, if you stop listening to the background noises all around you, if you stop for a moment, what do you feel? Listen to that, act in consequences. You do not need other people to tell you who you are what to feel, how to act. You are your home, you are the only you, listen to you, no one knows yourself better than yourself.

Hope you’ll have a beautiful day, night and life.
Lots of love, Naomi.