I just had the urge to write about this because lately, I've been struggling a lot. Growing up is not easy. Being independent is not easy as well. Sometimes, all we have to do is express somehow what we feel. It's not good to live life and isolate your feelings like they don't matter.

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sometimes we just need to pour out our feelings into something. A piece of paper, a song, a painting, anything. Even talk to a friend.

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finding a job is not easy, first of all. I don't know why I used to think it was going to be easy... I was just so unaware of how the world actually is. I remember those times when all I could think about was boys, and now I don't even have time to think about having a crush. Being independent is hard work especially if you grew up with overprotective parents like me.

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and after high school, there's this huge pressure for us to know exactly what we're going to be doing 5 years from now. Like I don't even know what I'm going to eat for breakfast tomorrow and you're asking me to make a decision that might affect my entire life. People in life, they will think they know what's best for you. But here's the catch, no one knows that besides you.

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and there's also that on top of everything. I just think too much, like overthinking? that's my specialty. No, that's my hobby. I'm anxious about everything nowadays. It feels like a virus that passes to everyone once they go through puberty. Social anxiety? yep, I also have that. Like it's not even cool people. The Internet makes everything cooler, but in reality, people just think you're weird if you don't like being around another human. Maybe that's more of an antisocial tendency, but whatever.

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So I think this will be the last thing I'll talk about. You know... friends are complicated. Humans are puzzles that have so many pieces missing. Many people are just your friends because you are physically close (literally just because you live in the same town or go to the same school). This is psychology and shit. And then once you finish high school and you all cry together saying you're definitely not going to forget texting each other... 1 year later you don't even remember their dog's name anymore. They get a haircut, make new friends, start dating and you only find out these things thanks to social media and a little bit of online stalking. It's just a weird phenomenon. Someone you knew so well... becomes a different person in a span of months, a few years. I had people that never texted me, once. We used to hang out, talk about life and complain about teachers. Now I don't even know what they're up to me, and it's been months. We, humans, are very strange. Just moving out can separate people physically and emotionally. You know, yeah. Life sucks, most of the time. But when it doesn't, it's great. We have to go through all of this, to get these moments when life feels good. It's okay to question things, totally okay to feel lost. Just keep going tho. things will be okay... I think.

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