i wish you knew how much i cared about you.

during the summer of 2016 i fell in love with you. you helped me guide to the better path when i was having my mental breakdowns. i thought you were perfect. time went on and we had our first kiss... it was amazing, it was everything i expected. but then i ended up in the hospital for a concussion and you blamed yourself for it, you said "i wish i was there, i could of protected you. you were the only one who checked up on me, the only one who was willing to visit me. time went on and you got into drugs. i remember that day when your mom told me to help change you.. i really tried man..

you were in and out of jail, i remember staying up for hours crying because i didnt know when i would be able to hug you, kiss you, make you smile.. your drug addiction was getting worse, it wasnt that hard to notice. your cousin gave me your sweater one day and told me to hug it whenever i missed you.... i wore it everyday, it smelt like you. the day you told me that you were able to visit me during the holidays was the happiest i have been in months. i started online shopping for a gift to get you, and i found the perfect one. the day we were suppose to meet.... you ditched me in the cold for your friends to do drugs.. i felt so embarrassed and heartbroken man.... i just wanted to see you.

time progressed, i didnt leave you because love is such a dangerous drug. you got more aggressive towards those who cared about you. which lead us to break up.. you don't even remember but i do...

the thing i wanted to say was that even though i hate you... i really do. youre still in my prayers, i wish that you find something that motivates you to change, to go back to the person i fell in loved with years back. right now you're going through a tough time, as much as i want to be there for you, i can't and i won't because you know what you did... this relationship was not suppose to end like this, we would start talking about having a future together, my family loved you and yours loved me as well. i wish you knew how much i really cared about you, but i guess you never will know