I remember as a child, and even teenager I wanted to fast forward time to when I was 25. It seemed like the right age to be settled into life, to know who you are. To find your place in the world I suppose. Now I am almost 25 and though I know who I am, I don't fit. Life isn't like a puzzle. There are no rules and no one to tell you what you can and can't do or how to be happy. I thought I would want to be married by now and having a child by the time I was 26. In reality I don't want anything traditional. I don't know if want children or if I want to get married. I don't work a traditional job like I thought I would be. I don't drive the nicest car or even live in a house. I don't have a picture perfect life. Hell most days I don't know what I am going to eat if I even eat at all. I am not where I thought I would be in life and that's okay because I am doing the best that I can. Some days are great and I am the happiest I can be, and some days I don't want to get out of bed. I don't have super close relationships with my family. It is hard when we have our own lives and I enjoy going home to my cat. I thought skipping ahead in time would answer my own personal questions. No one knows the answer to because we all are just trying to figure it out. As a teenager I wanted to skip time so I could make my own rules and listen to my parents. Yet here I am at 25 and nothing is really different. Yes I live in my own place with my boyfriend and I can do as I please yet I am doing everything already that makes me happy. It isn't exciting or fascinating but I am doing my best. Each day trying my best to be happy even if it is as simple as getting my whole apartment clean or watching a good movie at home. We all think that life is so hard growing up. And yeah at times it can be, but it gets better even if it never seems like the crap is going to end. I thought I would never be happy and that everything sucked. And well I am happy everything still sucks sometimes. It is those simple things that matter. The days where you smile and laugh the most or even those days you cry. It all works out, and if it doesn't then we die. I don't "live my life to the fullest" I live happiest.