im being too greedy, i need to hide.

i honestly never thought i could fall in love til i met you. i was naive and young. to me you opened a window in my heart that i can never close again. thats you, you made my love begin.

its dark, where is the light.

you left me, all alone here to face the mirror. the mirror that reflects reality. all the memories come back and i'm still here left alone with a ring still on my wedding finger. the speech i prepared to give for our night is still in my mind. maybe, i was wrong to think that we were serious.

tape 10 time 4:15am

Babyyy I've been staying up for you.
I know you always tell me to go to bed, but how can I when my day isn't complete without you.
I'm still waiting for you to text me that you arrived home.
I hope we can call today, even the smallest conversations we have make me happy.
I hope you slept well and ate a good lunch and breakfast,
I want you to stay healthy and happy.
It's us against the world together forever.

tape end.

i hate myself, and my heart

i tried to find someone to close the windows you opened. the windows wouldn't budge though. i was still stuck on you and not only did it hurt me but, hurt the ones i tried with. i fucking hate myself, i hate that i'm still stuck on you when you left me months ago. all that is left in my heart now is the cold breeze that enters my heart from the window you opened.

it hurts, it fucking hurts

when you left, my heart started to hurt physically. there were times where i thought i was gonna die. the pains hit sharp like a knife was pierced right through the center of my heart. every time it hits, my breaths becomes short. the short breaths and pain makes me shake. honestly, while i'm writing this the pain is there. i don't know what i did wrong to deserve this.

bring me back, back to those days.. i'll be happy

as i look through my camera, i feel nostalgic. i miss the days where i'd stay up just to talk to you. the days where i longed to hold your hand and you'd promise that it'll be soon that we'd be together. the day you stayed up just to reassure me as i went to the hospital. all i'm left is memories that makes me fall in love with you all over again.

it hurts.. that you were my first and last love.