babe, we've come so far and lost so much. i dont think we're meant for each other, yet we are forever linked. we are a duo, a pair, fit together like twisted, jagged, and broken puzzle pieces.

we're over. but here is a list of things that remind me of you.

las vegas

boat, colors, and hotel image building, Las Vegas, and wallpapers image
do you remember that weekend we first got together? i set off to las vegas the next day. i remember laying under the covers in the bed in the living room area of the hotel room, texting you late at night with the curtains drawn back so i could see all of the strip. las vegas carries your spirit in my mind, and i can vividly recall your jokes about driving there to meet me, and about being caught up in the energy of vegas as i walked around the streets, grinning because of you.

fall out boy's save rock and roll

music, rock, and concert image FOB and quote image
the first night we were in vegas, i chose to finally listen to this album. every single song seems tied to vegas, and to an extent, you. the album carries the energy of our relationship as well. i wouldnt trade it for the world yet it is bitter. it is youthful and filled with rebellion, but it will always end.


Temporarily removed birds, duck, and lake image
remember the switzerland trip? for a plan that took place only in a group chat, i can remember it so vividly. its silly but i still think about going to switzerland with you. if we lasted, i wouldve loved to get engaged there. like we pretended we were gonna all that time ago. has it been 2 years already? i don't really know what switzerland is like in person, but i wanna find out with you.


travel, map, and girl image Temporarily removed
maps. to anyone else, that would seem like a silly thing to associate with you. but, that's what ive known you as. the first time i messaged you, your username was the cartographer. now, i call you another version of that name. 2 years ago, i didn't know what a cartographer was. now, i know, but i'll always think of you.

min karlek

quote, sweden, and inspiration image Temporarily removed
you said you were swedish the first year. you said you knew swedish, and though it was silly considering you were not going by that time zone, i wanted to believe you. you called me min karlek. it means my love. you're the reason i want to learn swedish, you know? i always forget about that pet name, but sometimes i will hear or see it and be reminded of you. god, i shouldn't want you back but. sometimes i really just want to hear you call me that again.


protective image otter, puns, and quote image
"i can't remember your name", you had said. the first two letters of my username had been 'ot' back then, and with that small sound you crafted a nickname for me i still sometimes use today. otter. your otter. if you look at my username on here, you will see it starts with otter. that's because it was like a second name to me. i aimlessly pined for you for months, but you seemed so distant. in the course of a day we fixed our friendship, and you calling me otter after so long was a triumphant moment.

theres so much more that fill my memories of you. like billboards. and diners. but i think this is a good list that shows that i love you in a weird twisted way, as i can never voice it to you, and i know it could never happen in real life. in a sense, you were my first proper love, but our drawn out love story has reached its end and we must accept that.

so this is a way to let you go.