Today was the best day of my life.

Why? A boy just told me that I don't matter to him. This was a boy that I had put a lot of effort into getting to know (you may remember him from my other article, To the boy who left me behind. I will link that below. If you'd like to know about how/why we reconnected, send a message). This boy really messed with me, even after understanding my past with abusive, manipulative relationships. He wasn't good for me, but I still tried. I always try. But, today, he finally slipped up and told me that I didn't matter to him and that we should stop talking until he can figure his life outโ€”that I needed to give him time.

The old me would have absolutely ๏ฝ“๏ฝˆ๏ฝ๏ฝ”๏ฝ”๏ฝ…๏ฝ’๏ฝ…๏ฝ„. I would have completely disregarded this act of blatant manipulation and betrayal all in the name of loneliness. I would have begged him to stay; I would have done anything to make it happen. Most of all, I would have blamed myself.

But today was different. Today I said, "Okay."

And when he apologized and asked me not to hate him, I didn't respond with too much anger or sadness. Instead, I said this:

"I don't hate you. I don't think I'm capable of hating anyone even if I tried. People hurt me enough as it is, I don't need to hurt myself. I know I'm worth a lot more than how you're treating me and how you've been treating me. You just need to know that you're kicking one of the most compassionate, understanding people out of your life and betraying their trust. And that's fine. It's your loss. Just know that, when you realize what a big mistake you've made, it's very difficult to get me to trust again. And I won't ever believe that you truly care about me because you just treated me like I'm nothing."

I'm so incredibly proud of myself and how far I've come in terms of my mental health. I no longer allow people in my life unless they want to be there. I no longer chase after people who disregard my value. I am not completely healed, but I am healing. I am getting better.

Please don't beg people to love you when they don't deserve you. Once you realize that you deserve better, you become free.

Temporarily removed Inspiring Image on We Heart It Temporarily removed quotes, love yourself, and empowerment image
The first article I posted regarding the boy I mentioned in this one. Note the changes in my mental health between the two. It's just proof that things do get better, and it all starts with self-love and acceptance.