I tried to give up. I really did. But I couldn't, I just can't. I don't know why or how, but there is always a little bit hope. In my heart, in my soul and even my mind.

I tried to banish it. My feelings. The hope. But my heart, my soul and secretly also my mind didn't give up. That is not the worst, they still have hope and it seems like they will always have hope.

I want to get rid of it. Because it hurts. My heart can apparently resist the disappointment, every time. It doesn't give up. After ever pain, after every disappointment, it continues to have hope. I don't know how. It hurts so bad. It is as if I can't breathe because of the pain. I don't want to hurt myself, but I do hurt myself. Every time again.

My heart hurts me.
My soul hurts me.
My mind hurts me.
But I don't want it. Not anymore.

What can I do? I hurt myself more than other people do. I am fighting myself. I am having a battle that never want to end. I can't win. Not anymore. I did it for so long, but in the past I was a strong girl.

Now I am just a stupid broken girl.
Constantly in pain.

Written by: bllackwater
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