Starting university is a huge step we take in life, not only because we decided what is going to be the job we will have in the future, but it´s also a way to close a phase and start being more independent. For now on, everything that happened depends on us, and that´s pretty scary. Nobody wants to make mistakes in any circumstance, but we tend to believe that if we mess up now, everything in our lives will be a fail.

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We heard adults telling us how fast they graduate and how flexible are universities now, they look down on us and the worst part of this is that we believe them. Things change, but that doesn´t mean that everything is easy, every career requires hard work and persistence. Also, you are a different person, which means that you may be weak in one area but you are strong in another. If someone tells you that they´ll be doing better than you, ignore them and focus on yourself knowing that you can do everything you purpose to.

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The mistake I made, that I used to consider unforgivable, was choosing the wrong university. It’s pretty ironic how people warned us about choosing the “wrong career” and don´t warn us of universities. By the way, I want to clarify that there´s the perfect university for everybody and this wasn´t mine: I started my first year of university happy and ready to learn and I ended up sad, disappointed, embarrassed and angry with myself.

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I sign up for 6 classes and the first reaction of the coordinator of my career was: “are you sure you want to sign up for 6 classes? That´s too much, I had lots of people that did the same and that didn´t end well” And I know what you may be thinking, she was giving you an advice, I thought the same but it wasn´t. Every time she could, she persuaded me to quit, the pressure she put in me was unbearable. I was so indignant because that person was telling me what I am capable of without even knowing me. The only person that can determinate what I can or can´t do is me. I went to the finals and I passed them all, I was so proud and happy.

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However, the second part of the year was a nightmare. The pressure of study 6 subjects completes for two days, my mental health that was giving me clear signs that I wasn´t ok adding that I isolate myself made this end of the year a disaster. I was so stressed, sad and hurt with myself because I believed that I was a fool and that I was letting down my parents. Don´t stay in a university that is constantly putting obstacles in your career, incentivizing you to never graduate. Put your mental health first, I used to minimize everything that I was feeling and at the end it all explode. Also, chill, a mistake does not determinate all your life, it helps you to learn and grow as a person.

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Apologies for any grammar mistake, I´m not a native English speaker.

Love,

Frau Neuer
Frau Neuer
@frau_neuer