feelings are stupid.
they have a hold on you so tight you forget how to really feel in the first place.
i dont know why i let feelings stop me from feeling at all.

beyond a simple desire, a small crush or an enemy, feelings take control.

my feelings stop me from being enough, as though in my small world i come second best to everyone else, like its a race and i got a late start.

its as though i watch the world turn from behind a window, as though i am watching other people living their lives i just forgot to live my own.

am i even living? or simply existing.

i fabricate these daydreams as if they could help me escape the disappointment that is reality.

i wish i couldnt feel.