Today i just contemplate upon the concepts of trust, love, sincerity and friendship. I think about these a lot, but today i feel the past, i feel the scars of the past, how deep down they are. In some way i just want to separate myself from anything and anyone from that past that reminds me the hurting feelings i had. Again and again i ask myself have i done something wrong? Is something wrong with me? But then i realize i should not go harsh on myself because the end of that line is not bright.
Day after day, being in the same environment hurts. I can't tell this to anyone, i don't wanna hurt anyone even if i am deeply hurt. And i can't face the past either, i can't go up and say "You hurt me deep and you are not even aware of it, you hurt me continuously for a long time and i bare that just because you are a good person in core and i believed in you. But then, you hurt me worst, betrayed me again and again." I can't say these aloud. I cannot face the past.
Every little thing that comes and goes, continuously affects the way we live, touches us, whether we realize it or not. And as once said in a beautiful movie "Once you met someone you never really forget them." Every one and thing is a part of us and we are part of them, we are a part of a greater existence, we all share the same human core, same spirit that came from one. Trying to understand this gives me a wider way of thinking. Though i am still not strong enough, not strong enough to be able to not get hurt..
