Lou and I arrived at the cinema fifteen minutes early for the Sunday matinee: "La Femme Nikita". People from school often labeled us a rather pretentious couple, but honestly, Lou insisted on going to these French foreign films because 1. they were much cheaper than American films, and 2. he could focus on me without fear of missing out on the conflict between Captain America and Iron Man.

The unfortunate truth was that I felt like a vacant building with Lou, always elsewhere. I originally believed our relationship would produce a blossoming euphoria, but this was not the case. We were a watercolor landscape by a lethargic artistーwatered down shades, sloppy and smudged. However, I genuinely wanted to love Lou the way I loved you.

He ran his hand up my thigh, oblivious of the screen. <’Souriez alors. Ce sera un bon début.’> He began to kiss my neck excessively. <’Souriez quand vous ne savez pas quelque chose.’> I intentionally focused on the dialogue of the movie.

I remembered French class with you, (last year to be precise)ーthe first time I ever saw you. It was quite a crowded classroom, but you refused to blend in. I listened to you recite French poems with your eyes closed tightly, never neglecting an accent mark. When I lent you a black pen, you would say merci, setting my heart aflame and transforming my cheeks to embers. You WERE pretentious and began tutoring me on Saturday afternoons. I stared at your lips, watching them curve to achieve the perfect je ne sais quoi. You were as captivating as the Louvre and all the masterpieces at its core. You were not a careless watercolor landscape. Nature essentially reflected your beauty and goodness as spring approached with its pink skies and butterflies.

Halfway through the movie, Lou was snoring softly, dreaming of being anywhere else. The movie continued.<'Je ne l'ai pas vue depuis un moment. Elle est...Elle est radieuse’.> This particular line in the film caught my attention: “I haven't seen her for a while. She's...She's radiant.” That is all I thought about for the remainder of the night.