This is a letter to a friend that she will never read. Because I need to write it somewhere. Sorry about me not posting anything yesterday. And sorry if it’s not that post you are waiting for. You will not find good vibes here, neither some aesthetic and powerful stuff, but just the story of a friendship, that you may will relate about.

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So yeah, I really have to study today. And I know that you do too. But I’m suddenly thinking about you, about me, and how close we could have been if things didn’t happen that way.

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Most of the time, I don’t think about you. Because I don’t really like your new friends, and because we’ve been torn apart for long now. But recently, it hurts a little when I see you. And sometimes, I miss you.

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I still own a lot of pictures of us, but I’m mostly drowning in memories.

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3 years old, when we first met. I had no one, and you were so nice to me.

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4 years old, when we lost that friend. The first death that affected me directly. I’m sorry I never talk about you, but we do think of you. You’re not forgotten. Love, and peace.

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5 years old, when our teacher found us hiding in that toy chest. We wanted to stay all night together, exploring the school.

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7 years old, when all we did was fighting against each other because I was so jealous of that girl that you hung out with. Then she moved to another city.

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8 years old, when you were so jealous of that girl I hung out with. You had no reason to be, I swear.

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You were my blondie, and I was your brunette sweetie

9 years old, when our teacher got angry because we kept asking to draw suns and smileys on her board. At the end of the year, we were so worried to be separated because we moved to middle school. We weren’t.

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10 years old, when our friends meet. We used to go out together so often, back then.

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11 years old, when our friends fought and we were torn apart for the first time. That year, we went together on the bus every morning, and we used to always talk about new projects that we will make later.

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Dreams, projects and wishes that we truly believed in

12 years old, when you asked me to come at that circus class with you. I didn’t want to, but I wanted to be with you again, so I came. I never regret it, we laughed so hard every week. Then we bought that Stitch suits to be paired on the school’s gala. We found out that both of us kept that state of mind, living like happy children forever young, dreamers and reckless.

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Ohana means family. Family means nobody gets left behind or forgotten

13 years old, when you took your friend to Disney, even if we kept talking about that day when we could go together when we were younger. This is dumb, but that really ripped my heart off.

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14 years old, when I told you about my fear to lose you, because you were so important to me. You didn’t care, and you made me quit circus.

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When "us" became "I"

15 years old, I was so mad at you that we didn’t talk for one-year long. We never had the occasion to solve this, and that ruined everything.

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16 years old, I see you doing all that stuff with your friends. I want to do this with you again so bad. We see each other’s at parties, and now you’re dating one of my close friends, but we don’t talk anymore.

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1 week ago, when I told you that I missed you and you told me that it didn’t matter because we live so close, we have so much friends in common and even if we will never be as close as we were, we will always be more or less friends and we will keep in touch indirectly. I agreed, because I didn’t want to annoy you more. But I’m not ok about it. I sincerely miss you.

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So yeah, I know that I sound pathetic and all, and I don’t want to bother you with this stuff. But I do think about you, a lot. My friends judge you, they don't think you're good enough. Who cares? Certainely not me. And next year, we will leave high school and the only thing that I want is to keep talking to you. Not like this, but like we were before. I don’t care if we changed and all, it never mattered, it didn’t bother us before. You were my best friend, I, and I know so much about you that no one will never know.

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You have to make a choice now. You were my partner in crime for all my childhood, and you still are a huge part of my life. Hakuna Matata, remember? Please talk to me, and not only when you’re alone at school. You’re not like this. And I freaking do miss you.

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Please know that I’ll ever, ever be there for you if you need me.

Laetes ♡

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Article wrote listerning to Bastille – Glory and Halsey – Colors (stripped version). And Ed Sheeran – The A Team. Our song, forever.

| Love will never be forever, feelings are just like the weather |

I'm sorry if this happen to anyone reading this, but know that you're not alone, and I think I can know how you feel. Feel free to text me, I'm here for you.

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