*don’t take what I say in this article too seriously *

Ok so I’m pretty sure that everyone’s aware of the fact that us latinas are fucking awesome (duhhhh). So here’s a guide on how to be a badass latina (cuz we’re the baddest of them badasses).

SPANGLISH

Ok so first off you gotta show everybody that you’re latina so of course you gotta use spanish for every third word you say and then expect everyone to understand.
And make sure to roll those rrrrrrrrrs gurrrrrrrrl.
tip: add some of them cardi b catch frases in the mix and you’ll be good to go. Examples: okurrrt and eoooow
Oh and remember to act offended when a non-latino doesn’t understand you’re language cus it’s 2018 and who tf do they think they are.

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MÚSICA

Ok like are you even latina if you don't know the entire lyrics to i like it and criminal? Like osea por favorrrr🙄
Listening to bad bunny and j balvin is a must.
You have to be in love with maluma, there’s no saying no to that one.
You need to know the lyrics to at least 4 ozuna songs, at least.
Everytime gasolina comes on in the party you HAVE TO scream like a retarded whale and run to your other latinas and dance to it even if you barely even know the chorus.
Even if you hate despacito you still sing along to it, no exceptions.
Remeber to always pay tribute to the good og 2000’s bands like Camila, Reik, Jesse y Joy and Ha-Ash.
You’ve gotta know soda, you’ve just gotta know.
Three words: te boté remix

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SPECIAL REQUIREMENTS

- lady on the streets, freak in the sheets
- freaky af (We’re not even ashamed of it anymore)
- novelas
- hate trump
- throw shit at peña nieto even if you’re not mexican
- red lipstick
- gotta make a slutty outfit look classy
- scream whenever you meet a fellow latina
- know how to move your hips the right way
- gotta love parties
- feminist af but also wants a husband to take care of you financially
- a mí me gustan mayores, de esos que llaman señores
- you have to start a fight with everything
- chisme
- speak with a try-hard ratchet accent
- refuse to use proper grammar
- the bigger the hoop the bigger the hoe
- be a bitch and be proud about it
- don’t deal with any pendejo’s shit
- strong independent woman waddup
- pequeñita pero peligrosa
- world champion on cat fights
- be ready to cut a bitch
- support all races cause it’s 2018 bitch and we’re mixed
- still lowkey pissed at the whites for being lame
- you’re a reina and you know it
- frida kahlo has to be your hero si o si

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That’s it guys! Dont take this seriously, it’s clearly a joke (only my true latinas can relate)

-V