Almost 2 years ago I decided to become a member of the theatre club. I just wanted to try something new because my life was pretty dull. My town is small so here are not many drama clubs. But I still had a choice. So I stopped on one studio of art named "Miracle". When I came to this place first I was really fascinated by people who I met. They did amazing things on the stage and it was very impressive. After such performance they showed me their dressing room. OMG it was so small but so cozy. There were a lot of bright clothes, animal masks, books, 2 big mirrows, little electric kettle, a lot of pencils, pens, markers, 2 compact tables and benches for entourage. I don't know how there still was place for dummies but it was!!! People here gave me tea and sweets. I was so happy to come here. Time was passing but I still was afraid, not of the stage but of my own body. I couldn't control it. I was taught how to breathe, stand, go and even move chairs in the correct way. I felt like I don't know anything about the world. I felt like one minute ago born chicken. I was scared. So I was just behind the scene dreaming about winning of my fear. Some time I was afraid of myself. But then I began thinking that stage is really magnificent. I started to admit that when I'm on the stage I feel safer than in the hall. It was such a strange feeling. The stage beckoned me. So I took all my fears in fist and squeezed it. I knew what I was doing. I trusted myself. I became stronger. I felt it. I got to know my new side. Then I decided to take part in performance. I was ready for that. Performance was close so there weren't many viewers. When I've heard my name which was calling me on the stage I wasn't afraid, not. I was EXCITED. For sure. I went on the stage and forgot about everything. I wasn't thinking what am I doing. I was feeling it. And than I've heard it. Spectator's laugh. You know it was like a music for me. I was so happy to hear that my performance is really worthfull. I wanted just stay on the stage for one more second and show more of me. All stage was mine and I felt so free under soffits light. It was incredible. After prepeared performances all actors had to choose a theme and make another performance. There were living space (you have to show your reaction to new place), waiting etude (what do you do while waiting something), etude on special word (somebody tells you one word and you have to say only this word on the stage but it shouldn't be spontaneous) and etude which needs 2 people "I do - you do" (one person should do something with passion, another - with opposite emotion). To be honest I was worring because I didn't know what to choose. Then I thought that etude with partner is easier because you always have a hand in difficulties so I decided to choose etude "I do - you do". I was lucky because my partner was cute girl and I liked working with her. So we got 5 minutes to make our small performace. It was very hard because neither of us had good ideas. We were just running about the dressing room in panic, trying to find props which would help us (our producer said that stage should look interesting, like more things on the stage - more variants of dealing). so we just threw ALL garbage, we could find, on the stage. In one moment it became very dirty but we already had a plan. We decided that one of us would like to clean but other would't (lazy me). And then our time was left. We had to act. I have to admit that it was crazy and very funny. We tried to deal according the situation and it's hard when you don't know what to wait from your partner. Nevertheless, I had a good time and producer liked our performance and laughed a lot (he said my character was cool, OMG). So this autumn I will be taking higher actor class lessons. It supposed to be more exciting. But despite all these things I'm still not sure who I want to be. Sometimes I'm dreaming about being an actor but I also find a lot of things which stops me. I haven't decided yet. Is acting just a hobby or maybe something more? Thanks for reading me. It's very pleasant to write thingswhich burden your soul, don't you think so? I hope you'll find your way. Let's do it together.