I know you are not okay.
... and that's okay.

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There are so many version of broken heart stories that I've ever heard, read, or knew. They are just so sad, because whenever a person told me about their story they put so little words into the tale, yet it broke them real bad and somehow my heart cracked a little.

But maybe, just maybe, this can make you feel a little better...

1. Ask yourself, 'How long do you want to be this broken?'

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You're crying when you asking yourself this. But doesn't it hurt when you cry yourself to sleep? Let me hug you and tell you that everything is gonna be okay. Not perfectly okay, but finely okay.

2. 'He is not all the bad guy, isn't he? Didn't he made you happy, too?'

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You hate him, I know. But I guess you hate yourself more because you allow him to do this to you, isn't it? Don't hate him too much, everyone is selfish when it comes to love and happiness. You just gotta find your reason to forgive him, to forgive yourself.

3. Have you talked to him when you're calm and collected?

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Did you ask him the 'why'? If you are afraid of the answer, you are not ready to move on. You will wonder around and blame yourself to the point of not accepting yourself. And it is unfair.

4. He didn't break you, he just broke your heart.

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And you are going to pick up the pieces and make it stronger. You are your own warrior. Hold yourself together. Nobody can save you but yourself.

5. Walking alone doesn't mean you're lonely.

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Go to library. Go to park. Go to gym. Whatever heals your soul. You are your longest commitment. Make sure you are okay before you make sure someone else.

6. Stop thinking about him like he owns your world.

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He came to your life and now he is gone. He will never get the kind of love you gave him. He will never understand how much effort you put for him. He left the special place you made for him. His choice, his loss.

7. Songs for the broken heart.

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- Heart Like Yours by Williamette Stone
- Hurt For Me by SYML
- Let It All Go by Birdy ft Rhodes
- Closer by JP Cooper
- Bird by Billie Marten
- The A Team by Birdy

Heal your heart. You got this.

8. Love yourself. You are enough.

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Trust me on this, you are so much more than enough. Life isn't always consist of rainbow and lollipop. It has thorns and fucking mountains. You gotta stand ten feet tall, wipe your tears, and tell yourself 'I got this'.

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Honey, if you can't love yourself, how do you know when someone else does?

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- Arika Herdyanti, June 2018