This poetry is from a stream of consciousness that I wrote a few days ago.

All the poetry in this is under "darling my stars are falling" which is the umbrella term I use for all my writing.

Like I say every time, I have a bunch of this on standby so if you want to here more then just let me know!

Disclaimer: I am by no means claiming I am a good writer, I just like to over-share my feelings and I find this is a good way to do it.
This was written at a time when I was unhappy, this work definitely reflects that.
So if this makes you sad, or you don't like it or want to read it because of that, I understand completely and I am thankful you took the time to even click on this article :)

Most of the writing doesn't really have a name so they are numbered for separation purposes, the numbers are by no means a ranking system.

1.

I am so greedy with my pain.
How can other people hurt like this and not show it?
Oh god,
Oh god,

I’m being so obvious.
I don’t want this attention.

Close fists, nails in palms.

What have I done?
I am so painful to be around.
Are you still my friend?
I don’t how to handle this, there’s to much noise.
Why is it so loud? Is that just me?

Oh god.
Oh god.

2.

I am throwing up over my words and onto myself.
I don’t know how to be who I am.

3.

Do I matter to you?
I am in so much pain these days,
I don’t know how to fix these mistakes.

Are they mistakes?

I hate how I treat people but I don’t know how to be a better person.
I give myself headaches.

4.

You talk to me like I am from a different planet,
But I am right here.
I am right here but you keep making excuses to leave.

Was that my fault?

Why do you only care about me when I don’t need you to?

Do you remember when this place was home?

5.

Did I hurt you?
Some nights I pray that I did,
Or that you are at least a little bit sorry,
Or that I at least changed you in some way.
Why do you never acknowledge me?
Why do I even care?
It is harder to be angry when I am the one holding the drink.
I think maybe I understand.

6.

I don’t know where I belong or where we stand and it’s like,
Maybe I’m in love but maybe I’m not and,
I used to be so sure but now I can’t talk about things and like,
Maybe I’m still sick but maybe I’m not and,
I understand but I am so confused and,
You aren’t here.
You aren’t here.
How do I get to the sky?
Or the bottom of the ocean?
Or anywhere that isn’t here.
How did you know? How did you do that? Are you sure? How can you sleep?
I can’t remember how I used to do this.

7.

It tastes vile on my tongue but it makes me feel closer to you so I drink it anyway.
I am disgusted with myself but I understand now.
I am so angry with myself for understanding you now it’s too late.

8.

I do not know how to touch people’s souls without bringing them pain,
I do not know how to be close to someone without crushing them,
I do not know how to take up space without wasting it.

9.

Some days I hate you so much the red fiery anger inside me keeps me up at night and wakes me again at 5 in the morning.
Other days you are the only person in the world I know how to talk to.

10.

Have you ever been so lost that you allowed yourself to be hurt in the name of knowing where you stand with the universe?

IF YOU LIKE THIS THEN PLEASE CHECK OUT MY OTHER POETRY ARTICLES