i'm so proud of who i became. don't get me wrong, i'm not where i want to be, not even close. i'm depressed, i'm sad, but i'm good. i'm a good person. for years on end, i was bitter, i was judgemental and saw myself siding with negativity constantly.
currently, i can proudly say i am a good person. i've made so much progress, i've stopped judging, i've gained new interests that make me know people better, more personally, instead of just judging them on how they appear to be.
i haven't forgiven myself for who i was when i was surrounded with darkness that i allowed to spread through and reach my most loved ones. i don't think there is any kind of excuse for that. i'm sad that the people i left behind and the people that have left me behind will always portray me in their minds as they met me. i stopped developing right there, i no longer exist, i no longer progressed into this best version of me. i know i have to get that behind my back, live in the present and care about making the ones who still are around feel positivity only, but i just keep on letting these ghosts haunt me. i just keep on wondering what they think about that old me - that old me that no longer is a reality.