care word count: 20

I’m still trying to figure out if someone cares, it appears that nobody does. That nobody cares. I wonder if someone ever has, or if someone ever will. I even wonder if I care, sometimes I think I don’t. But then, why do I care that nobody cares. It makes no sense. Unless, I only care about myself. And I care that nobody cares because, it is about me. Because I am selfish and everybody else is too.

In a sense maybe we all care. But we never really care. We never care deeply. Maybe there are some people in the world that do, that do really care. Not like when you see a tragedy in the news, and you care for a while, maybe seconds before your mind is occupied by something else. But they care with force and passion, they care with their life. I wish I was like that. It would be a blessing and a curse. That would mean pain and grieve, but also joy and contentment.

girl, nature, and sunset image

But I am not like that, I wish I cared more, I would feel more alive (me being selfish again). But I am not one of those people, at least I can hope to find one. Someone that cares so deeply, I can’t help but do the same myself. Someone that cares for us both, until I learn to do so myself. Because the world needs more people who really care, who care deeply.
-thoughts of an optimist in a bad day

I wrote this a while ago (more than a year) and I really don’t know how this came out of me lol