It's hard not to say this book influenced me.

All the bright place by Jennifer Niven

This book is not the newest one but still one of the best. Movie is in process, at least I heard about it - and I am so excited.

In case you didn't read the book or you don't know it at all - it's a story about a girl who learns to live from a boy who wants to die. This is like a promo text of this book. But this book is not about this, it has something more deeper and thoughtful. I guess I realized my behavior in these pages.

Finch, the main character, is young guy with bipolar disorder. On the internet you can see so many articles like
,,What happened to Finch?"
,,Why he's so weird?"
,,Isn't he tired of running at night?"
,,Can anyone really hold breath as long as Finch?"

okay, I am quite kidding. But yes, he's weird like me. And it's not a story where you wear rose sunglasses.

So what is Bipolar disorder?
It's a mental disorder that causes periods of depression and periods of abnormally elevated mood.

And this why I love and hate this book. Whatever Finch does or thinks, I feel like him. Did it happen to any of you?

One Day I want to be just a casual girl.
Another Day I am throwing away my clothes and want to be someone else.
One Day I wish the best to all people.
Another Day I can't even say a nice word to my family - and yeah, this is AWFUL.

He has his moods but it's because of his disorder. He thinks about death because of this disorder. But why am I every day someone else as he is? How can I see the difference between disorder and people's behavior and process of adolescence? It's more than half a year and I am still thinking and shouting at myself. I am trying to be the one person I feel I am but there's the other side that comes to my mind. Sometimes.

Is there anyone who feels like me? Like Finch?
And what do you think?

I wanted to share this. Thanks to all of you.