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"Vincent Van Gogh ate yellow paint thinking it would bring him just a little bit of happiness"
art, flowers, and yellow image aesthetic, art, and artist image photography image Image by quinn

Everyone feels sad at one point in their life. It could be from heartbreak. It could be from loss. It could be from a multitude of reasons, and sometimes, it could be from nothing. We feel sad, and when there's sadness, there's the feeling of loneliness. Loneliness when you're sitting there, alone, crying your heart out, and you stop and look around at the emptiness of the room. You start to wonder: Why am I crying alone? Why isn't no one comforting me? Why doesn't anyone care enough? And there come the fresh wave of tears, those tears from the questions of "what is wrong with you" and "maybe I deserve to feel this alone". This sadness, this pain, this tiredness of feeling these two emotions, could last for days. Weeks. Months. Years, even.

And let me tell you this- keeping it all bottled up inside of you isn't going to help the pain go away. Like ants manifesting over a discarded snack on the ground, the pain will keep on coming back in waves until it gets to the point where you hurt so much you let it come. This isn't healthy for your brain nor your heart. I can't tell you the science behind it, but bottling up so many emotions is too much for even the most powerful of people to handle.

However, with every condition comes a remedy. With every bottle of secrets there's a cork. All you need to do is uncork the bottle, let all your feelings out. Find someone to talk to, find anyone. It could be a trusted friend, a family member, a nice grandma walking down the street- anyone. It could also be the internet. Publish your thoughts, if you want to, in an article on this platform or others. Let all your emotions flow. And, if you don't want someone else to bear or listen to your pain, you can always write it down in a place where no one will find it. A little secret place where you bury all your pain.

I promise you'll feel better. I really do. Speaking it out into the quiet night sky or into a wrinkled up piece of old test paper does it's wonders. Because, by hearing your pain out in the open air, by seeing it written down on paper, you're no longer keeping it all inside of you. It's out there, and you don't have to spend time thinking and unconsciously remembering why you're feeling this pain. You can let it go, let the toxicity of the pain disappear.

It won't be easy. It never is. But, once you let the pain go, you'll slowly realise that you're okay. After such a long time in the shadows, the feeling of "okay" may be one of the most wonderful feelings ever. And, to feel "okay"? That's enough. Sometimes we want to hold onto our pain for just a little while longer, and that's okay too. As long as you let it out somehow, sometime, you won't be hurting yourself anymore.

Everyone has yellow paint, everyone has a source of something they feel would make them happy. But sometimes, the only yellow paint one needs is the simplicity of an ear that listens or a pen that writes.

You'll feel better, I promise.

🌻 🌻 🌻

im blue
im blue