I used to have some very toxic friends but recently we’ve stopped being friends and I’ve been living a much happier & healthier life. I wanted to share with you guys what I’ve learnt for the better since ending our friendship and hopefully these will help you if you are in a similar situation!

Don’t feel ashamed for your interests
I used to be into things that my ‘friends’ didn’t like but I would say that I wasn’t a fan either because they weren’t. So for example, I used to like 5 seconds of summer but my friends used to criticise them, saying they were ugly & their music was bad. I went along with it and said the same and eventually I stopped listening to their music and wasn’t a fan anymore because I felt embarrassed that I liked them.
Since our fallout though, I’ve been listening to lots of their music I hadn’t heard before and I love it. They are my favourite band now and I’m not ashamed that I like them because no one criticises me anymore.
This is only one example but there are many other things that I would pretend not to like because they didn’t. You should never let people tell you what you can and cannot like, and don’t let them ruin what makes you happy!

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The only person you need to impress is yourself
This kind of links to the first point but I used to do stuff so that my friends would like me more. So I’d buy clothes that I think they’d like, or I would only listen to pop music because they did. I felt like I couldn’t be myself and that really upset me.
Now though, I wear what I like and I’ve started listening to other genres of music that is more my style. I feel much happier knowing that no one judges me and I can be different from others.
Don’t let people stop you from being yourself and not doing stuff because you think they’ll judge you. If they don’t let you be yourself and criticise you, they clearly aren’t good friends, as I figured out!

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Have a positive outlook
Before, I used to always look negatively on things because my friends had a very negative outlook on everything. I wouldn’t get friendly with people who they didn’t like and I would criticise stuff that people I didn’t even know did.
Now, I’m still a bit pessimistic but that’s because of my personality. However I do speak to more people and I try to look positively on stuff. I’ve learnt that the atmosphere I was surrounded in by them wasn’t healthy and made others judge me because of how negative we all were. Even though it’s hard sometimes, you should try to look at stuff from different perspectives and realise that the bad things you say can affect others. Try to be nice to at least one person a day and you will feel much happier!

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Learn to love yourself
I used to feel embarrassed by my looks because my friends were pretty and cared a lot about their looks when I didn’t. I thought that I should look like them and I would wear makeup all the time so that I could hide my insecurities.
Recently I’ve stopped wearing stuff that they wore and I’m proud of myself. Yes, I might not be the prettiest or thinnest girl but I’m happy with the way I look and I’m so much happier with my appearance. We are all different so you should embrace your flaws, wear what makes you feel special, and don’t change yourself for anyone!

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Everything happens for a reason
I was sad for a long time about the situation I was in but I didn’t want to end our friendship because I was scared of what would happen after. I’ve learned now that things will only get better and making a difficult decision can lead to good things. If something feels wrong and you’re not happy, then do something about it. At the time it will seem hard and nerve wracking but if you change it, it will benefit you in the future. There are always people who will support you and remember, everything happens for a reason!

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If you’ve read this till the end, I just want to thank you. It was quite hard for me to put this out for people to read but I feel much better about it now. If you are in a toxic friendship, I hope that what I’ve learnt from my experience will help you too!