H E Y E V E R Y B O D Y !

So, I didn't really get this until no so it's going to be a little late, but this is day 6 and it might be a little sad, so don't get sad. 🤘🏾

What is the hardest thing you have ever experienced

As you guys already know from DAY1 is that I have High-functioning Depression, basically what high-functioning depression is; it's a form of illness that is not intense enough to noticeably affect the ability to perform daily responsibilities. so basically I never really showed the signs of not being able to get out of bed or I couldn't keep a good hygiene down or my grades flopped. Everything was fine, on the outside but on the inside I felt EMPTY...

alone, broken, and cry image
This is so sad I am SORRY!!

Like I didn't have a purpose in life anymore, I was hopeless.. I lost interest in the things I loved like writing. I was irritable,I would get upset easily and I was never really like that, I gained a lot of weight then I should, I had major headaches that couldn't be fixed. It just felt like my thoughts were yelling at me all the time, and I even thought about what everyone's life would be like if I wasn't alive..

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This is so sad I am SORRY!!

Would they miss me?
Would they even care?

I knew that I had depression I just never knew what type cause I was able to get out of bad and I wanted to do stuff with friends and family, I thought it was Seasonal Affective Disorder because of the lack of sun I was getting since I live in Alaska. But I just didn't feel or care about any emotion part of me or anyone else, and that scared me..

I didn't know who to tell because my mom was really busy, my sister never really cared, my friends don't really think about how I was feeling, and my grandparents were so old school thinking kids shouldn't be depressed since they have nothing to worry about. So I kept it inside and never told anybody, I mean I would say stuff about it to my mom when she wasn't busy and she would tell me top go see somebody but I never did because I thought that was admitting that I had a problem so I never did anything and sometime it never bothered me, but sometime I would just SNAP

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This is so sad I am SORRY!!

I would have breakdown where I just cry for no reason, my friends and family would ask me why and wouldn't tell them cause I didn't even know why I was crying. It was till then I finally fessed up to my mom about it and she took me to the doctor to see what they could do.. the prescribed me to some anti-depressants and since I was a early stage they put me on a low dosage of Lexapro and I was fine everything had stop and I finally felt good..

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This is so sad I am SORRY!!

Until I had an other breakdown at the wrong time, my pills stopped working where I put in danger me and my sisters life and I could never forget it.. So after that they put me on a medium dosage of Zoloft and I started taking so vitamin D pills, and I started to see a therapist every two weeks. Things started to get better I no longer feel that empty anymore, I have my day when I do but they don't last as long anymore. so of the other thing I did was cut some thing out my life that made me sad and how I felt. I unfollowed a lot of people on social media, just so I could feel better.

But that was the most hardest thing I ever had to experience..

So that is the end of this depressing journey I really hope you like it and I hope you check out Day5:

Or try out this challenge:

And I'll see you in a few hours for DAY7 but to make you happy here are some non-depressing things you could read or help you grow, Enjoy!:

XOXO
-KIANNA