As soon as the words left my mouth I could see the hurt in your eyes.
You looked at the hands in your lap and I felt it.

This was the first time I hurt you and not the other way around.
You have no idea how good that felt.

You looked up at the with your blue blue eyes.
I watched your thin lips form the next question.

My eyes were so cold. My heart was colder.
"No." I heard my mouth speak the lie.
It felt my words cutting the air around us.
Satisfaction was slowly replaced by numbness.

I heard us break.

There is not one day I don't regret speaking those words.
I wanted to hurt you.
And I did.

But the words that I spoke were not truthful.
And now I wish I could apologize.
I wish I could look into your blue blue eyes and say
"I'm sorry."