The wind blows quiet as I smoke my cigarettes in the place I last saw you. I lean back with my head over my hands, the stars don't seem as bright somehow. Maybe the sky is sad because you left, or I've reached a point where everything around me seems as depressing as myself. That's probably it.
A girl walks by and she looks at me intrigued, she probably wonders what the hell am I doing laying like that with my cigarette at the verge of burning my face. I would tell her if I knew but I don't know what I'm doing anymore. It feels like I'm an spectator at the lousy ass play that my life has become. I don't feel in control anymore, everything revolves around me out of my reach, and I couldn't care less.

boy, deer, and field image bae, black, and boy image

The ashes fall and burn my face but I couldn't be bothered to move. I've gone from feeling sad to feeling numb, and I think that's somehow worse. But I'm not sure why.
I wish I could ask you, you always seemed to have the answers to everything. I think about it now and I'm pretty sure you didn't, I just liked the way you told your lies, like everything was just fine.

Image removed quotes, grunge, and blue image

I have this stupid flowers that I bought for you, but it's not like you are ever going to see them, so I might just throw them away. A piece of stone with your name carved on it doesn't need flowers.
It just started raining, how funny. I hate rain, that's the only thing that could make me move right now. It's almost like the clouds knew. Are you whispering my secrets in their ears? How typical of you, trying so hard to make me happy. Damn it, you just made me laugh like an idiot running under the rain.

Temporarily removed dark, grunge, and boy image

I look for you in everyone I see. But no one has eyes as gentle as yours. I should stop thinking about this now but I just can't stand that while I run soaking wet, you are peacefuly sleeping under the pouring rain.

please listen to this song if you have the time, I swear it's worth it

My other articles:

Important note regarding some of the tags:
If you know someone who has emotional stress or suffers from an eating disorder, self-harm or suicidal thoughts, keep in mind that there is help available waiting for you.
Please click here to learn more about confidential psychological counseling and a list of services that could be of help: https://weheartit.com/help/prevention-resources.