Relationships have always been an interesting topic to me. When I was around 12 or 13, I craved a relationship. A lot of my friends were starting to get their first real boyfriends at the time and I suppose that fueled the fire. In the 7th grade, I finally found myself a boyfriend. He was someone I knew very well and could talk to easily. The relationship didn't last long as I grew tired of him being dependent on me. He wanted my attention all the time and I didn't care enough to give it to him. At the time I thought, maybe it's just him. His obnoxious traits did outweigh his descent traits. When high school rolled around some boys wanted to talk to me. I always felt highly uncomfortable during the conversations and would block them after a day or two. I thought there was something wrong with me. It wasn't like I had this horrible idea of what love was because I thought love was this beautiful thing yet I could never get close to it.

Now, 2 years later, I finally understand it. To me, love is a complete act of surrender. A complete leap of faith. A leap of faith I wasn't willing to take for just anyone. When you get into a serious relationship, you are giving yourself up mentally and physically to your partner, and all you can do is hope they don't ruin you. This was something that I wanted to you with the right person. I thought I found the right person but they hurt me before I could give myself up completely. (which actually isn't a horrible thing.)

Thanks for reading and you should definitely tell me about how you view love and relationships by messaging me.

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