If you take the time to read this I will literally cry because this is so personal and I'm a little scared of people reacting to my work!

So for the past 5 or so years of my life I've done a lot of poetry/prose writing as a kind of outlet.

I've never been great at understanding my own feelings so writing really forced me to think about the way I felt.
I just wanted to share some of my favourite pieces with you today!

(P.S. most of them don't have names, so they're just numbered for separation purposes.)

1.

Neither of us have ever been very good at saying “I love you.”
So instead, I ask if you’ve had enough to eat,
(“Take this fruit bar, I’m not hungry anyway.”)

And you offer me your umbrella when it rains, even if it means you will get wet.

(“Honestly, I don’t mind the rain anyway.”)

And together we exchange “I love you” in languages so quietly spoken but so universally understood that I never had to wonder if you loved me, because I already knew.

Actions have always carried more weight than words,
But for what it’s worth I’m learning to use those words anyway,

And I love you.

2. Don't turn people into homes.

You burned me.
Not the kind of burn that leaves scars,
But the kind of burn that leaves ashes.
You took a place where I felt at home and destroyed it.
Now all I can do rebuild.

3.

And despite it all I still feel the need to tell you,
You brought out an inescapable brightness in me.
You made me believe I could glow shades of gold and exhale stardust simply by being myself.

So for that,
I will swallow my pride and I will thank you.

Because the person I am now,
Is much greater than the person I was before I met you.

4.

The place I used to call my home is now a haunted house where the ghost of my past with you lives.
Where the memory of my first heartbreak is always present,
the floorboards creek like a beating heart,
and the wallpaper tears away like memories trying to be forgotten.

The place I used to call home is now a haunted house filled with the echoes of a broken love that refuses to die.

5.

“Maybe when we’re older.” We whisper,
As if time has ever solved any of our problems before.

“Maybe then we’ll see this more clearly, and we’ll do all the things we’ve ever wanted to do. We’ll be the people we’ve always needed ourselves to be.”

6.

And if I could,
I would give you an infinite amount of new beginnings.
An infinite amount of times to start fresh,
To let go of the things that drown you out at sea,
And start all over as many times as you want.
I would give you an infinite amount of good days,
And I would give you more happy endings than you have the time to live out.

I would give you everything,
Just to see you smile again.

7.

I guess I just want you to miss me.
Is that a terrible thing to wish on someone?
Probably.

But it’s true,
I want you to wake up one morning and wonder how I’ll be spending my day today,
I want you stay up late thinking about how things could have been different.

I want you to want to be back in your life,
I want you to miss me the way I miss you.

8.

One day I won’t feel like this anymore.
One day the pain will end,
and I will be able to look up at the stars without wishing I was one of them.

One day I am going to be okay again,
and I will not let you tell me I won’t be.

9.

Can’t we just be kids?
We spend so much time at each other’s throats these days,
wondering how we end up in these situations to begin with.

We spend so much time coaching each other out of panic attacks,
afraid that we are letting everyone down.

We spend so much time wishing that we were somebody else,
anybody else,

someone who knows what they’re doing,
someone who can be a better friend,
someone who can handle the weight of the world better than we can.

Can’t we just be kids?
We’re too young to carry this kind of weight on our chests.
How can the world expect us to be so strong already?

Can’t we just be kids.

10. The circle of my life.

I don’t know how to pick up the pieces,
or put myself back together again.
So I just sit here alone,
and I bleed,
and I bleed,
and it rains,
and rains,
but nothing ever changes.

That's all I'm including on this article but I literally have hundreds of these that I could share if people wanted to hear it!!

If you want to hear more or are just curious about the story behind any of these pieces then by all means message me or just let me know somehow!!

If you even bothered to read this then from the bottom of my heart, thank you !!