i feel like a heavy cloth of shame over my head everywhere else i go
it's so painful to not wanting to be looked at, but still wanting attention
i want to be beautiful, but not looked at
i want to be general, but not the same
i want to be loved, but not to be loved
i want a boyfriend, but not the attention that comes with it
i don't want to be close with anyone or anything because i get bored easily
i hate everyone
and i just don't know why
depression brought me in this thing of
not knowing myself
losing myself
and hating myself
all at the same time
the pain im carrying with me worths more than over thousands of tears
pain
and fears