Every time she wakes up she hears birds chirping off into the distance.

Ever time i wake up i hear cars honking outside my small window.

beautiful, birds, and morning image buildings, cars, and city image

She has a smile like no other because she has no reason to be upset. she wakes up to the most beautiful view of the ocean with the sun rising, signaling the start of a glorious day.

Meanwhile i wake up with the cold hugging every inch of my body, i'm not greeted with the beautiful view i have always dreamt of one day having. Im greeted with 4 plain white walls and a mirror. Reminding me of the way i look and how i don't look like... her. I have bags under my eyes because of all those sleepless nights, i don't have that beautiful sun kissed look, and i have harry legs because i never have the time to shave. i look out the window and all i see is dark black clouds signaling the start of a sad rainy day.

sunset, sky, and clouds image sea, ocean, and view image bedroom, bed, and room image arms, black, and bored image

She has many friends who give her bright smiles and never stop talking... always having a conversation brewing amongst the group. She looks around and spots her boyfriend. They would be describes as the perfect couple to whom ever sees them, and people wish to only have a connection as strong as theirs.

I have only a few friends here and there. They don't all greet me with bright smiles in the mornings. I don't have a boyfriend to walk into the comfort of his arms and kiss me on my lips. I never see a couple to whom i wished to be like one day because they keep going there own separate ways.

girl, party, and car image couple, love, and goals image alternative, beautiful, and cigarette image night, girl, and light image

But...

What people don't know is that every time she wakes up she feels like her life is displayed for every one to see. Never having privacy because everyone can see her through those big beautiful windows. The ocean makes her feel as if she's drowning with nobody to save her. The birds are black crows that seem as if there ready to attack her with their vicious beaks. She's terrified. She only smiles to put on a show.
Cant you see?... Its all a mask.

I wake up... perhaps not with the most beautiful view but in my heart theres this roaring fire that keeps me up at night. Always a reminder to keep on trying and that i would eventually succeed and have the life i always wanted to live. And all those sleepless nights doing so much homework will one day be filled with peaceful nights looking out at the glorious ocean... feeling freed.

hand, ocean, and dark image girl, summer, and beach image

She gets out of that expensive car and sees her fake ass friends she wishes to escape. They all give her fake smiles, while thinking how much they despise her. They always talk about the drama and never about actual important things that are happening in the world. She hates them, its that complicated. She looks around bored out of her beautiful mind and spots her lying, cheating boyfriend. He doesn't like her and she doesn't like him. Them being together was just an arrangement from their parents. He's always making her do things she doesn't want to do when he's bored, which is often. Then he goes off to the next girl.

stars, art, and black image alone, cry, and dark image

Im greeted with my small group of friends that trust me enough to see them with their true selfs. They trust me with their feeling enough to show me whats really going on, and ill be their every step of the way, listening to their wants and needs, because they need me. And i'm happy to be their for them. I only have a little bit of friends but there as real as it can get. No fake bullshit. EVER.

friends, friendship, and light image

I don't have a boyfriend, but i don't wish i didn't have one because i know it can be nice but i'm also glad that i'm by myself because i can pay attention to what I need and what I want. Im still trying to find myself out and i'm perfectly ok with being alone. I am enough. and i'm happy.

She's struggling to be herself.

While i'm happy waking up to my small simple room with rainy weather because after the storm is bight sunny glorious days.

sunset, girl, and summer image

-Gen xxx