march 30. 2017 @ 11.50 pm :

i wish you'd just pick up the phone,
tell me everything's okay.
just be there for me,
when i need you the most.
why is it so hard for you to be there for me;
to be here,
to be by my side.

i feel so broken lately,
but it's funny because i'm not sure why.
why i feel this way,
why i'm slowly falling apart.
it hurts,
so much.

i can't take this;
the thoughts,
the thought of me giving up.
the fear,
the fear of people leaving.
i don't have anyone to talk to,
everyone leaves.

they don't wanna talk,
they don't wanna listen.
but all i want to do is talk,
i just want someone to listen.
just give me an hour,
or even five minutes.

just hear me out,
let me explain.
please understand,
please listen.

because the more i carry this around,
the more i lie to myself.
the more i hide my emotions,
pretending i'm okay.

i'll eventually explode.
i am scared of what i'll do,
what will happen.
a person can only take so much,
i can only take so much.
i am just so alone.

-khyra k.n