I think it’s red or at least it smells like a red rose or is it purple? I can’t tell the difference sometimes. You’re probably thinking what in the name of all that is beautiful are you doing? Well, I'm guessing the color of the rose from its smell. Now, you’re thinking I'm crazy, but this is how I see, through my nose and my ears. You see, I can’t see. I’m blind.
The park is beautiful today. The voices of birds, children playing and laughing, adults talking, dogs barking. And the smells of flowers, trees, the perfumes of the ladies sitting in the neighboring bench. I can almost see them.
I wasn’t always blind so I know how most things look like and I can imagine the rest.
I know most people expect a sad story about my struggles against the darkness. And although I struggled at the beginning and I still have my struggles now but my story isn’t sad.
People usually feel sorry for me when they know that I'm blind but they shouldn’t. While they have two eyes, I have thirteen; two ears, one nose, and ten fingertips. Yes, I can see by touching things too. I can do almost everything people with two eyes do.

One of the most amazing things i can do is reading. I love reading. It’s like losing and then finding yourself in a book. It’s like traveling through space and time without leaving where you are. Thank God i don’t need eyes to read.
Being blind taught me a lot of things like how to know how a person’s feeling from his voice, or what someone looks like by touching his face. Losing my eyesight made my other senses more alert and more sensitive. It made me feel more, made me more attentive to people and things around me. And instead of being dependent on my eyes only to see, i depend on my whole body to see and feel. Eyes can be quiet deceiving if you only depend on them. That’s why most people don’t notice much about what’s going on around them. They look but they don’t really see.
I have a dog. His name is lucky. He helps me with the things that i can’t do like crossing the street without being hit by a car and things like that. I wasn’t a big fan of dogs before losing my eyesight. But now i can’t imagine my life without my dog. He’s not only helping me but he’s also my friend. Don’t worry i have human friends too. Actually i have a lot of friends. I wasn’t a very social person. I had friends but we weren’t that close. I didn’t want to get attached to people or to be close with them. But now i have all types of people as my friends.
It’s strange how a single event can change everything you think you knew. That single and sometimes small event change you and your life become before that event and after it. Sometimes this makes me think what small and vulnerable creatures we are that small incidents turn our lives, make us doubt and question everything we believed in before. But maybe it’s not a single incident; maybe it’s a sequence of small moments and choices and decisions that led us to this particular moment that changed everything.
But i don’t like to dwell too much on how this happened or if i could have prevented it from happening. I’ve learned to take advantage of the present and dream about the future. I want to enjoy my life.
As i mentioned before i have a lot of friends. I love them very much. They don’t treat me differently. They accept and help me. Some of them are also blind. We try to experience new things or old things in a different way. It’s great to have people who understands and supports you and push you out of your comfort zone. I think those are the best type of friends. They push you to do new things but also know when to give you your space. They know when you need a word of advice and when you need someone who listens and understands you.
One of the best things about my friends is that they have different personalities and backgrounds. I like learning about other people’s cultures and traditions and where they came from. I used to do that through books only. But now i do that by meeting actual people instead of the characters of a novel. I learn new things every day and meet interesting people. It’s amazing what you can do, learn, experience when you let go of your shyness and get out of your comfort zone.
In a way, losing my eyesight helped me. It made me want to challenge myself. It made me want to prove myself. Of course, this change didn’t happen overnight. Sometimes it was painful and slow. Sometimes things happened so fast that i didn’t have time to process what was happening to me. Sometimes i felt like i couldn’t recognize myself which made me feel lonely especially when everyone around me were changing too and i didn’t know how to deal with them and they didn’t know how to deal with me. It took some time to finally realize that i needed to accept the change if i want to be happy. The result was amazing i started going out more. I started meeting new people. I started doing and learning new things. I was beginning to enjoy my life.
I accept my condition but that doesn’t mean that i don’t miss having my eyesight. Everyday i miss seeing the faces of the people i love, i miss seeing the sky, i miss seeing the colors of autumn which is my favorite season, i miss seeing my room, i miss seeing colors other than black. Sometimes, when i’m going through a bad day, i wish that this didn’t happen to me and i wonder if i could do something to change it. And sometimes, when i’m going through a really bad day, i wonder if i did something wrong to deserve this. So, like everybody else i have my bad moments. In the beginning, there were a lot of these bad moments but i learned to deal with them.. Yes, i will have some really bad and depressing thoughts and i will keep wishing and wondering because i’m human and i have feelings. But instead of complaining and moaning and being miserable, i choose to be happy