Hello Hearters,

Writing today is a really challenge of my writing challenge lol because I am going to write a letter to a 8 year's old myself and that child, in my past, is living a very awful moment. I had a great childhood, make no mistakes, but it was different from the other children. And If I look back now to that period I can see so many things that I've missed. I am not talking about things I didn't do, I am talking about the bad vision that other people had about a ill child in 2004 and trust me, it was really different from today.
Maybe some of you won't understand what I am going to say and many of you won't understand the whole situation, also because you have no context. I won't give you, I am sorry. It's not what I want to do today, I just need to have a conversation between myself and I.

diary grunge doctor life

Dear d, I am so sorry.

I know you don't like these words, they have no meaning, right? But It's me talking and I know you understand why. I am not talking about your present, I am talking about your future. I am so sorry about your future. It did not happen because me, but I feel gulty and I don't know why, maybe because I know what will happen to you - to us - and I am powerless in front of all this and I can't protect you.
Yes d, it will come back when you will be 16.
I know you though to have an adolescence like you saw on tv, but you won't be like the girls of your favourite tv shows; I am sorry, I seem ruthless with you but you deserve to know the truth. I don't want to scary you - there will be time to that - I wanna prepare you.
Well, I am not going to talk about "that", you will discover it by you own, but I wanna give you some advice for your life before it. After the therapy and the transplant your life will completely change and your vision of it too. After the surgical operation it will change more and more and you will try to live a life in a different way; you're not so good doing that, but you are trying. That's why I wanna prepare you to live like that before get ill again. I know, I know it! You're not like the others even now, but I want you to be it more.
Live all the experiences you can, don't be afraid or too lazy for doing them.
Make friends. I know it's hard but try to be more friendly or more cheeky, don't be so shy please. But do it with the right people! If I can give you another advice: don't change your sit at the middle school, you know of what I am talking about. And about the middle school, don't kiss that boy, it not worth it, trust me. Instead when you will be 12 years old, don't waste the opportunity with that one at our country house. And live it, live that period, live the house as you can. Even with that friend of our cousin: tell him that you like him. Don't be stupid, nothing bad will happen.
There will happen so many things, bad and good, very good. You will recive a big reward for what you had been through. but It will be not the end. I am so sorry, again. I am 22 years old and it is not finished yet and It won't, almost for 5 years. Maybe it will never get to the end.
Now I am in a moment in which I don't know what will going to happen, I don't make projects, I can't say if it is a bad or a good period. I don't know, I am sorry, again. Maybe it's good as it is. You don't need to know everything. Don't be scary, maybe if you will follow my advice, you will have the strengh to make you help yourself right now and will be more and more happy for all the good things that will happen in your life.
Oh no, they are surprises and I know you love them.
The last, but not less important, is about writing: don't stop, never stop writing. You can do good things.
I won't finish this with all those phrases you don't like - I don't like - so I will end this letter telling you a word: cats.

Love, yourself.

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and my other articles here:

See ya soon,

- themermaidwriter.