WARNING: This may be not so explicit, yet some of you may be triggered by its content. Let me say that no abusive relationship is implied , this is just a product of my imagination, and some of my friends' as well. Feel free to read it as an extract of a story that is yet to be told and written. Enjoy🤗🌹

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- How many?
How many men before me, that was what he meant. His question echoed in the empty room, like a single bell in a quiet, frozen night. She startled, as if touched by the same unexpected sound. His naked chest was broad and darkned by the shadow, and he was keeping her close to it, like a weapon.
- Why are you asking me that?
- Just answer
Yet with him there were no clear answers whatsoever, just claims, and passion, intense and wild. Not love, never love: love was inconvenient, love was hers. He was barely giving her what her body and her soul were asking. Yeah, speaking of asking.
- First, there was a soldier... - she didn't know why she forced herself to answer - I was supposed to enter a cloistered convent, if it wasn't for him...it was a girl's love - She felt him smiling against her neck.
- Then I got married, for the first time. He was a good man. He...I - she couldn't help but start shivering. He hugged her a little tighter.
- ..I just couldn't open up with him.
- Did you have any children?
- No, we didn't.
- And where is he now?
- Dead
- Did you kill him?
- Yes.

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He didn't comment on that. He knew what kind of person she was, and what she was capable of. It was why he stayed in that bed with her, that night.
- And then?
- And then nothing. My new husband would touch me only If I were more masculine. But I don't judge him, he is in love with someone else. Besides, we were pratically forced to get married. You know, family duties.
He didn't say anything about that either. When he spoke, it was to say:
- So now it's just me. -, with a hint of ownership.
- I thought you didn't like that - she whispered in return, drawing invisible circles on his skin.
- How come I wouldn't like that? I can't stand sharing.
A thrill came down her back, but for all different reasons.
- I can't stand sharing too...
The air was now tickled with sparks of electricity. She felt his arm slowly circling her hip, to attract her closer.
- I know you'd like_ exclusivity_ from me...- he gave her a chaste, yet promising kiss on the lips, while saying that.
- Yes..please..- she heard herself answering, managing at the same time to respond to the kiss.
- Yes... - he said, and it was not clear what he meant, if he was about to claim her, like he was used to in moments like those, if he was just trying to shut her up and prevent her from saying something he wasn't ready to hear yet; she just realized for the ntch time that he knew, he understood her like anyone else.

I love you, she tought, between fierce kisses and scratches, I love you, but she said that to herself only, her lips clutched on his shoulder as if she wished to drown in him, and loose herself in the process - she loved him, she loved him like a fragile, neurotic woman and a murderer, a traitor of her family: irrationally, unconditionally, and 'till death.

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