I still remember it vividly...Watching the clouds and the pretty sky,smiling to myself."Today's gonna be a good day."My mind going over every activity I did,how far i've come and what is next."i've come so far! I stopped my panic attacks, I'm starting at my new art school and I am letting go of the past.Things are looking great for the future! I'm finally getting my life together..."
Or so I thought...

I stop at the school gate and then suddenly my heart rate heightens.I feel my pulse everywhere.There is a constant buzzing in my head.I feel...I feel sick...almost like I'm dying!"
No this can't be! I was fine for months...this can't be a panic attack...It, it can't be! I let go of that horrible fucking past! I was over it! My eyes well up with tears and everything hurts.This can't be, because I know that if it is, I can't handle it.

When I got home...things went from bad to worse.I was hysterical! Screaming, crying and in shock. I tried to drink something and then I threw up.My heart is pounding, my chest is burning and I am hyperventilating...I feel like I'm going crazy! I'm so,so angry and shocked! Why?Why today?Why ever again?! I just couldn't stop...I'm powerless...Nothing can make it better.I'm alone once again in the most horrible situation.I could barely speak... It's too overwhelming!

I can't do this...No, not again...Please don't.

It is currently 12:21 PM and I'm a wreck...My face hurts,I hurt...everything hurts.

How am I going to save myself from this this time?
I need help...