How do you feel?
It's a simple question, yet not one many ask to those whom they know. This simple question can open a heart of a person whom thought no one cared. It can also brighten someone's day. How do you go about your life? Are people always being the ones giving? Hence you always being on receiving end? If you say yes to this, I am here to tell you this must change!

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In any relationship, whether it be between lovers, friends, or family, there must be a balance of receiving and giving. What do I mean about receiving and giving? If you are a giver, you are the person that always gives an ear to a friend, family, or lover. You are always there for them when they need you and are always the one they seek for advice or help. If you are the receiver, you are the one the giver is there for. Being more a giver or a receiver can ruin the balance in anyones life and never results to happy endings.

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In the event your too much of a giver, you'll end up feeling frustrated that no one is pouring into your bucket the way you do to them. But this will never change if you don't speak of it. Tell Those around how you feel and set the boundaries that promote the change you want to see. In my life I am a giver but I changed in my way of giving making sure there is a balance. Those who would just take and take are not taking anymore for I stopped making myself available to them. This didn't mean I stopped loving people, it just meant I started loving myself more. My giving to certain people was detrimental to my happiness. It should have never been that way! You should never regret giving to someone (I'll write an article explaining more of this). I saw myself at the disposal of a receiver who didn't care of my happiness, or well being. They only cared if I was able to contribute to their ongoing needs and happiness. This wasn't healthy. In some cases the receiver isn't being malicious or self centered, they are the receiver in your life because YOU allowed them to be. If you always give someone a cookie upon their visit to your home and without them asking for it, there will come a time where they will always expect said cookie. They will be a day they'll visit and it might not even be to see you but because you offer free cookies. Let's say one day you don't have cookies for whatever reason, they'll get angry or become uncomfortable. Why? You've conditioned them to believe they'll get cookies when they see you. You've conditioned them to believe they can get cookies without effort. Its okay to share your cookies, but those around you should want to help you in making them as well, if they can't do that, then they help you buy the ingredients. Understood?

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In the instance you are more a receiver than a giver, you must analyze your life. Look into the area where the people you love gather. Do you contribute to the love that is felt? Do you help another with their needs the way help is given to you? Are you open to hearing someone's problems or are you always doing the talking? If so, this must change! There will be a day when the person or people around you might pull in the reigns. They'll let you know of your self centered ways. Or, if they've had enough, they'll just be silent and leave. As I have done before. I limited my interaction with a receiver. If they gave it was so they can receive once again. If you love those around you, show them. Sometimes its as simple as asking them "How are you?" or "Are you feeling okay?" The person who is always giving to you and helping you with their problems might need you to help them with theirs. Just because they don't always talk about their issues with you doesn't mean they don't have them. The strong vessel you see before you might be quite empty inside. Show that you care and give what has been given to you.

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It's never too late to make the changes one needs do to become a better person and make your life better. Change is scary, for people do not know what the changes will bring and people fear that; the unknown. But there have been many unknowns you have already faced in your life and look at you, you're still here. Be all here and live your best life and create the balance that helps you do so.

-So long for now from the WHILAND of Honey