cautions:

For all the grammar's police/NAZI out there,
just be quiet.
I'm not writing to be corrected by Y'all.
I'm writing cause I wanted to
and I'm still learning how to properly write in English.
So, please be quiet.
Shoo~

******************************************************************************

Hey

We've finally talked

last Friday [1st December 2017]

you called my name

and you asked for my permission

"can we talk ?" you asked.

again and again, I let you

I let you

I give you a chance

to apologize

But you never...

We've finally talked

last Friday [1st December 2017]

After 2 years of separation

or

could I say

after you left me behind?

after the night I told you about me

after the night I told you about who I am

after the night I told you about (all of the stories from this series)

1-4

cause now you've been counted as

5

why?

Did you scare of me right now?

I knew it

I knew

I always know

I do know you have

so many

random thoughts

how could I have so many random guys around?

how could I have so many different and complicated boys around?

how could I have so unrealistic love stories behind?

how could you meet this girl with a chaotic mind?

I knew it

I knew

I always know

after several times we discussed

about

all

...

you've been gone

yeah now I know

you can't accept that

you can't be together with a girl who already broke deep inside her heart

you can't be together with a girl who already messed up deep inside her heart

you can't be together with a girl...

like me

I accept that.

I respect your different perspective.

The only thing

the only thing that made me unrespect you anymore is

you left

without any words

without any explanations

but I'm okay.

We've finally talked

last Friday [1st December 2017]

After 2 years of separation

You told me what the reason was

I laughed.

That's ridiculous

you...

"scared with the distance between us if we gon dating?"

I laughed.

That's ridiculous

you...

Lie

A week after you left me, you've got a new girl.

How did I know?

Dude, you need to be more selective before you post anything

on social media.

You showing off your new-girl right away

A WEEK AFTER.

A W E E K A F T E R

you're not kidding me, right?

mau dekat lagi?

ew...

after 2 years...

Kenapa?

Kenapa alasannya tidak ;

"kamu terlalu baik buat aku"

"aku mau ujian"

"aku mau konsen belajar"

sekalian...

maksudku.

Hahahahaha

Alasan macam apa, itu?

I knew it

I knew

I always know

Meh

Basically

you aren't my type

you aren't my ideal ones

you aren't the best-man-I've-ever-met

you are so basic

but

because you brought up my trust issues

after such a long time

so

I'm scared

I got panic easily

I'm freaking out

you made me scared

cause of my issues

you made me scared

cause of myself

you made me scared

you made my heart scared

that's why

I knew,

you already came into my heart

..

my best friends know how much I hate you after that

yeah

I hate you.

I hate you every day.

I hate you for every second of my life.

you know,

some people said

you only hate someone

when you're in love with them

but for this one,

I'm pretty sure

we're the exception.

cause after you,

I stop trusting someone.

since we were separated in 2015

until I met him

my 21st November one

I'm trying really hard

to write the thank you parts

my hands have shaken

my heads spinning

my feet frozen

my heartbeat racing

my brain won't stop thinking about

why?

why you left me?

why are you not trusting me?

is it because of my past?

you hate me, don't you?

you laugh behind me, don't you?

after you know who I really am

after you know I broke so many hearts behind

until I realized

wait...

I need to stop...

i

I

I....

I should take every advantage of my broken heart

Every broken-hearted stories should make me stronger

Every broken-hearted stories should make me better

Every broken-hearted stories should make me more mature and wiser

Every broken-hearted should help me improving myself

God always send different ways

to make human learn

to make human generous and kind

to make human strong

to make human fearless

to make human more thankful

and that is it..

the way from God

to make me better

to make me ahead from the others

God sent you..

Thank you...

because of you

now I believe

it's okay to believe in someone

even at the end of the stories, he goes away

it's okay to believe everything is not okay since the beginning

even at the end of the stories, it'll be okay

it's okay to believe it will happen

even at the end of the stories, it won't

it's okay to believe in yourself

karena sebaik-baiknya percaya kepada yang lain,

dirimu tidak akan mengkhianati tubuhmu sendiri

You taught me

How to believe

in everything

again

And now I believe,

everything will be okay

maybe not now

maybe not tomorrow

maybe not the day after tomorrow

BUT SOON...

It'll be.

Thank you....