Have you ever met someone and felt like you're the luckiest person on earth?
Like you've found everything you've been looking for in that person?
That he's your soulmate?
I have. I wish I hadn't though.

I first saw him on october 2016. In a café. We exchanged glances but none of us had the courage to talk to the other. But looking at him alone made me feel that he was special.
A week after, I went to university, and there he was standing with his friends, grinning and joking around. I couldn't believe my eyes. I couldn't believe this fate. He actually goes to the same university as I do, but different majors.
We had mutual friends but we've never talked. Just greeting each other from time to time. So I brushed off the thought that we could be together. I didn't know the guy. I didn't know his personality or what he likes and doesn't. But I had this super positive energie coming from him.
On april 2017, I decided to add him on facebook, to at least get to know him. And he accepted me, minutes later, he messaged me with a "hey there." A simple hey there that made me grin. That gave me butterflies in my stomach.
I replied and that night was the start of my worst love story ever.
It was a weekend, and we just talked 24hours in that weekend. We both even barely slept, we enjoyed each other's company that much.
Monday came, and there he was standing with the same friends. I got super nervous upon seeing him. And I actually tried my best to avoid him. Until his classmate screamed my name. And I cussed under my breath and went to him. I said hey without hugging anyone. And just sat there. Next to his classmate talking. Then he came to me, he offered a hand to get me up and then I just found myself in his embrace. He was holding me so tightly, and I've never felt as comfortable in my whole life. I've forgotten the whole world in that moment, it was the best and the warmest hug i've ever had. Afterwards, we just smiled at each other and talked a bit before I left to class.
Ever since, we got closer and closer, we started spending so much time together at uni, go out together, get home and text, then skype. He was just everything in my life. I was falling deeper and deeper, and so was he. At least that's what I assumed. But how wrong was I.
He actually confessed to me. I confessed back, but he didn't ask me to be his girlfriend.
And one day, I was out with friends, and went to a café, saw him sitting there. With his girlfriend. YES. His girlfriend. I didn't know at first, so I went to say hi. But the next day, his friend aka my friend told me that she is his girlfriend and I kinda lost it that day.
I just couldn't believe it. I couldn't even cry.. I asked him and he said that he has a girlfriend since january. And that he couldn't stop himself from falling for me and that he wished he had talked to me that day in the café. He wished that I came sooner than she did. He wished he was single because he wants to be with me.
The stupidely in love me, believed his words and guess what. I became his second girlfriend. I was so blinded by love that I just wanted him to be mine, I just wanted him in my life. I couldn't bare losing him.
But that day came, I still remember it like it just happened. We were skyping as usual, with Pink Floyd's music in the background. enjoying each other's company, he was playing me a song on his guitar. 3am passed, 4am passed, 5am passed, and that's when it started. Our conversation got serious and all the laughter stopped. There he was telling me that he cannot lose his girlfriend and that she is everything to him. And that he wants me to move on, he wants to end our relationship. I just held back from crying so hard. After a long talk we decided that it was over. We both got quiet, none of us could end the call. How could we? When we know it was the last time we'd ever talk in. We just heard each other's breath through the earphones. 7am came and I just said "farewell" and hung up on him. And ever since, till this day. My heart hurts whenever I see him.

He basically ruined me.

[sorry for my english. It's my third language.]