7:02pm
(instagram Dm)
Hey i saw on your story, drive in movies? those still exist? awesome!
aha yep! i love vintage things
me too, what movie did you watch
spiderman. i know it sounds cheesy, i just love marvel.
its not cheesy at all! marvel is the ultimate best.

This went on through the night. my heart fluttering at every agreement we had, my eyes frantically scanning the screen every 4 seconds to see if you've responded.
you was my summer camp crush. Two years older, which made you're desirable, because i knew you could never like me. We talked at camp. We smiled to each other and waved slightly. friends, friends friends and that was perfect for me. you live approximately 45 minutes away from me. when you told me that you got your license i would imagine you coming and picking me up and then we would go have our little adventures together. We had everything in common, except our love for life. you told me i was naive to have that lust in me, i wanted to tell you that maybe you were the one that placed it in me. 4 months we talked almost every night. my skittering emotions radiating through texts. you weren't perfect though. you talked to me about everything. told me everything. but me? you kew only what i was able to squeeze in through your rants. you were wonderful. you are wonderful. you are everything i ever wanted. your messages became more flirtatious as did mine. but i left. i left social media for a while. when i came back on, you did nothing. no questions.

9:34pm
Hey umm im back
cool
yeah..
what happened
a lot
well i gtg see ya.

my heart dropped and i hated you. i hated you because i loved you so much and you made me believe you loved me. you ate away at my soul when i thought you were feeding it. you are not mysterious you are not that dreamy loner depressed badass boy i saw. but since i couldn't see your face
your eyes
i had only your personality played out on buffet waiting for me to devour
i had so much of it
that it left me feeling full and sick
but empty
i know however, i was not in love with you.
i was in love with the idea of us,

8:17pm
hey we haven't talked in a minute
yeah, hi.

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