every night I found myself crying over stupid little things that swarm my mind every day in school. for seven hours a day I see myself sad and no place to run and hide; I have nobody to run to either. change became such a bad thing that I lost everybody. every one of my friends left me alone in the dust. getting stared at in school, getting comments from each and every one of them. sharing classes with them led me to think, 'oh, maybe school can't be so important? right?' i found myself becoming miserable sitting in class and staring at the walls or scribbling in my books. I found myself becoming happy when I'm not around those people anymore, but one look I become sad again. It's not like I miss them? But each time I see one of them I feel a knot in my throat and I feel so sick to my stomach because how cruel and mean can someone be to someone else? the saying, "think before you speak", "what comes around goes around?" and all those- you throw away because you're so caught up in love that you care about your relationship with a guy you met three months prior to the school year more than someone you new for a whole three years? but i understand. you want happiness and i guess everything we had was just plain old crap to you. throwing away what we had to just be with your boyfriend because you trust him with your life, but I guess you never felt that way about me? sad, huh? you could've told me how much they meant to you and i would understand, but turning your back on me was a big mistake. I tried countless times to get you back but each time i tried your boyfriend would come attacking me saying you want nothing to do with me ever again. but what happened when i found someone i loved so much, did you feel like how i feel? thinking at night how did i fail you like this? do you?