I’ll meet him next spring.

When the rain has stopped, when the first warm summer sunsets has arrived. I’ll meet him when I have forget his eyes and how strong he is. I’ll meet him after he has kissed one hundred girls.
And I will have crush for him. We will chase playfully each others in the city lights. I’ll try to find a way to touch his curls and I'll be so innocent about it. We’ll grab a coffee and I tease him with my long lashes and blonde hair. We’ll spend the night in Helsinki, pretending to be in Paris. He will try to kiss me by the beach and I will turn his lips onto my cheek. We’ll walk and walk and I’ll push him to the corner of this beautiful old apartment what looks just like the one in the Paris picture. And I’ll kiss him. I will kiss him. I’ll kiss him, I’ll kiss him, I’ll kiss him.
I’ll lose my sleep talking to him via msm. He will be my spring crush again.

Niin on ollut ja niin on aina olevan.

Or maybe I’ll meet him with a girl. A gorgeous brunette with big eyes. She’s an artist, she paints really good. She’ll greet me with a smile and tells me how she had heard so much good about me. And how she understands. That is the problem, that she understands, that’s what I’m scared of. She’ll grab my hand and speaks how she will take care of him, and how he is an angel in this earth with his curls.
I know that he is.
And maybe he’ll text me how ’he made it’. I’ll answer him ’I prayed for it’
And the girl is his angel. I’ll have mine in a necklace, and that’s all I will ever get. And the boy will be always just a dream, a hope, something to cling on to. But maybe the less I know about him, the better.
I was scared that a relationship that has been once burned, will stay like that. But I’ll promise to try to settle down the burning fire with my tears as long as I live.

And I will stay gone.

Until you come back to me,

I’ll stay waiting for the next spring forever.

It has been cold since last august.

It still is.